Some people would say its romantic that Christina Aguilera would marry someone like Jordan Bratman, but those people are wrong and need to be punched in the balls. If life were a summer camp movie, Jordan Bratman would be the head counselor at the snobby rich camp on the extra fancy side of the lake, and I’d be the wise cracking party animal who, despite my gruff exterior, really does cares about the kids. Then I sneak in and steal away his girl after I prove he never saw her as an equal, only as an object. Rated Pg-13.
I don’t think that’s the real X-tina. I have a feeling she left Jordan McUglyhead years ago, so he killed her, stuffed her skin with M&M’s, and now parades her dead corpse around.
Look at those boobs! Completely unnatural, and clearly filled with Peanut M&Ms.
She is so amazingly hot. He must have a great personality… cause that’s all girls really care about… right? Right?
Whats with her pose in pick 4? She looks like she’s opening up for Seattle Slew. Were there horses at this red carpet gig they were attending? And was she strapping them on too?
I bet she ties him up and shits on him, who knows what these freaks do in private, WHO KNOWS?!
Girls also like a guy who can make them laugh Kyle. We can see he has that down pat without saying a word.