CBB followed the rumor this weekend that the real reason it took so long to see the first pictures of Suri Cruise in Vanity Fair, and the reason candid pictures of her have been non-existent since then, is because Suri has a large and distinctive birthmark located in the middle of her forehead between her eyes. The rumor is Tom and Katie were embarrassed and didn't show her in public until it could be addressed. CBB says:
It was rumored that there was a lot of airbrushing involved in her Vanity Fair shoot and this is what was probably airbrushed … We don't think a birthmark takes anything away from a child's beauty and are merely suggesting this as a possible reason the baby has been so carefully hidden … From what we understand, there are three major types of birthmarks: port wine stains, hemangiomas, and vascular malformations. We don't know what type of birthmark this is, but it's likely they have tried to have it removed or reduced because the color is very subtle.
Many readers have written in saying that they think Suri has an angel's kiss or stork's bite. A third of all newborns are born with salmon patches (which are typically found in the midline of the face or neck), with most fading by 18 months. I'm not suggesting that a birthmark like this would have kept her out of the public- I'm wondering if what we see in these photos is a port wine stain or hemangioma that is being treated and is now much paler.
Tom and Katie are idiots and they live in a world of make believe, so they almost definitely think a birthmark means their kid is a wizard and/or dragon rider. Obviously they have to keep her hidden from her enemies, probably an evil prince who prophecy says can only be slayed by the Marked One. Either that or the birthmark is just because Katie started punching her stomach when she heard Tom Cruise's seed was growing inside of her. Like they did in Aliens.
(SURI CLOSE UPS - close-up of the first picture here, the second picture here, the third picture here. Compare those to this picture in Vanity Fair)
She also has little to no eyelashes, and her eyes look like they’re made of glass.
Holy fuck she’s the Satan child. It’s a goddamn 666 mark of the beast right between the eyes.
It makes total sense, she is the first sign of the apocalypse!
Just a baby folks, nothing to see here. Just move along.
Yeah, that Vanity Fair pic is airbrushed to fuck. She looks like a creepy procelain doll. Why are dolls and clowns so creepy? Anyway, yeah, I think the kid got treated as they didn’t want it getting teased by the other babys. It’s going to have a tough enough time in school what with a brainwashed mother and control freak, midget-dad…
This is based on specualtion based on speculation, and uninformed guesses from people who don’t know a thing about these celebrities or skin conditions. Brendon, this is a fucking joke. Isn’t there something worthwhile going on today?
That’s what happens when the father’s an android.
shut up, she’s adorable. ridiculous.
I’ll be damned, thanks to alcimedes I finally have a chance to say this here: The “Number of the Beast” is actually 616. This has been suspected for ages, due to 616 being the numerical value (in Greek) of the name of the Roman Emperor Nero, who was persecuting Christians at the time, and the theory has now been confirmed (about a year ago, actually) by using the newest, most sophisticated scientific methods to examine the oldest known copy of the Book of Revelations (A 1500-year-old papyrus scroll written in Greek). The original scroll was badly-decayed and thus misread/mistranslated all along.
Let’s move on from this crap; the baby is normal; the parents are abnormal.
Where are the pics of Jeter sucking off Jessica Biel?
My apologies if no one gives a shit about this, but it’s amazing to me how little attention this has gotten since the confirmation. Makes you wonder what ELSE Christians have been wrong about all this time, eh?
However, I will NOT apologize for offending Christians–they’re wrong and they deserve to be mocked. Oh, and fuck Scientology too.
IT’S A WIZARD AND/OR DRAGON RIDER!!!
If they want to keep the little mutant out of the spotlight then good for them, and extra good for her. She’s better off if there aren’t millions of photographs circulating reminding the whole world of what freaks she has for parents.
Evil Xenu Princess
Leave that retarded baby alone. Just because it may have Down Syndrome and/or webbed feet like a duck, doesn’t warrant people making fun of it. Same thing for Christians. Anyone named after me couldn’t be that bad.
Actually the first sign of the Apocalpyse wasn’t Suri’s birth - it was the “marriage” between Katie and Tom. And just for the record - celeb snarking should not be limited to just the celeb’s, their families are open game too. Hell, we snark on Pammie’s miscarriage! There are no sacred Xenus.
Accuser, there’s too many things to list. All hail the flying spaghetti monster!
it’s obvious that suri is harry potter
That’s retarded.
Looks like it’s eczema. Pretty common for little ones.