Us Magazine says that Jessica Simpson and John Mayer are dating again, after a disastrous first try two months ago. The two met for lunch at Paradise Cove Beach Café in Malibu, last week. A source said:
"She didn't eat much. She drank double vodka cranberries. When they got up, Jessica was rubbing his back. You could definitely tell they were on a date. Mayer left a $40 tip on the $100 bill."
And a source close to Mayer says:
"It's a flirtation. I wouldn't call it full-on dating, but there is a fondness. He doesn't like the attention, but he likes her. He wants to avoid the public scrutiny of last time."
This is why dudes like John Mayer learn to play the guitar and come to Hollywood. Without a record deal, his hobbies would include renaissance fairs and celibacy, but instead he's getting felt up by a half drunk Jessica Simpson at noon, and that's only because he decided to give her a second chance. In hindsight, this story should be inspiring to people like you or your friends. Not for me though. I'm a big winner.
And now, year-old pictures of Jessica in a see thru shirt (more and bigger here).
If this guy doesn’t hit it, he fails as a man.
Does John Mayer have so many romantic options that he can afford to pass Jessica up? Looks like someone gave him a well-needed dose of reality…
Thank you for reposting those old pics…girls with big tits and small areolae give me a reason to wake up in the morning.
You know after a few double vodka cranberries, I usually have my dates rubbing something else. This guy is a wimp. Of course, Jessica is looking for someone like her daddy (cuz doing your daddy is “frowned upon” by everyone else) — they simply don’t understand the loving, fluid-exchange relationship that Jessica and her dad have.
you know he’s skeeted all down her throat already.
If this guy nails her sister next, he’ll be my new hero.
I am of the non straight sexual preference.
if he nails them together in the same bed, he’s god.
Twenty bucks says that John Mayer plays for the pink team.
Twenty bucks say John Mayer plays for my team and we fuck eachother every night.
Same dif.
Nips . . ehe ehe ehe . . Nips
if he nails both sisters in the same bed with their Papa Joe filming the event, then that’s one hell of a pimp.
“Without a record deal, his hobbies would include renaissance fairs and celibacy” Brendon, you are truly a hero.
She should really let me rub some Proactiv on those two red bumps on her chest. They might get infected and I’m sure it will take John Mayer months to get around to it. But, no talking during the process. I don’t want to hear any crazy babble about being sad or how her dad touched her.
John Mayer is my HERO!!! Most of the douche bags in the entertainment industry would gladly step over their drooling tongues to be the next guy to puppy dog after Jessica Simpson, but leave it to an A/V Club president who learned the guitar to make HER work for it.
Thought she was taking it up the butt from Tony Romo?? Wow, she gets around like the whore she is…
Tony Romo is banging her sister and Bill Parcells.
Not for nothing
Waiting for the sex tape…