09.12.2007 BRITNEY LOOKED LIKE A FAT PIG

According to Us magazine, the reason Britney Spears looked so awkward and self-conscious Sunday night at the MTV Music Awards in Las Vegas is because she could see herself on monitors throughout the room and she thought she looked fat and out of shape.  Us says:

No one was more shocked watching Britney Spears' performance at MTV’s Video Music Awards in Las Vegas on Sunday night than the 25-year-old popstar herself.
“She was also able to see video of herself throughout the auditorium,” a backstage source tells Us Weekly. “She flipped out. She came running off the stage, yelling ‘Oh, my God, I looked like a fat pig! I looked like a fat pig!’ She was inconsolable.”

I'm here to help, so in that spirit I like to mention that people seem to like pigs.  Pigs are funny!  They're all pink and they have that little corkscrew tail.  Plus, pigs are like superheros to the Jews, who many call gods chosen people.  Then, there's the half pig, half giraffe - Girrafapig! In a world gone mad … something something something … GIRRAFAPIG! Half pig! Half giraffe! All action!

(by the way, did Us really have to name that page "brit_fat_pig"?  jesus christ.)



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139 Comments

(139) Comments

  1. Jacktion! 09/12/2007 14:28

    She didn't look like a fat pig, she was (is) a fat pig!

  2. Jacktion! 09/12/2007 14:29

    If she thought she looked so bad, why does she look so look like she thinks she's the sexiest thing in the world in the above picture?

  3. ChuckNLead 09/12/2007 14:30

    That crying baby from that "Leave Britney Alone" video yesterday was on FOXNews this morning.  What a marketing genius he is.  It is a he, right?

  4. Jacktion! 09/12/2007 14:30

    3 in a row?

  5. Jacktion! 09/12/2007 14:30

    DAMN IT!!!

  6. mrbungle 09/12/2007 14:30

    Just remember that pig and elephant DNA just won't splice.

  7. easycheeze 09/12/2007 14:30

    if she thought she looked so bad why didn't she kill herself

  8. easycheeze 09/12/2007 14:31

    to think i jacked off to that pig 5 yrs ago

  9. Son of Bill Brasky 09/12/2007 14:33

    what really happened was she saw herself, thought she looked like a pig and then started thinking about bacon and sausage and what ti would be like to cover them in choclate and to eat them while chasing a chocolate pig across a field of marshmallows and cigarettes.

  10. Observer 09/12/2007 14:33

    She “thought” she “looked” fat?

    Wow - she must really be drunk.

  11. Pedro! 09/12/2007 14:34

    so fat and vain… this girls a double threat!

  12. tangocash0001 09/12/2007 14:34

    LOL i laughed my ass off when i read Doctress on the last thread and then so the title of this one….

  13. bryce 09/12/2007 14:34

    It proves how clever she is considering she picked that outfit… erm.

  14. Sarcasto 09/12/2007 14:34

    What I want to know is how did she pull off the miracle of adding 25 pounds to her frame but still maintaining a 2" gap at the top of her thighs?  Bomb or no bomb, Brit-brit is a true heroine!

  15. WWBKD 09/12/2007 14:35

    Don't those mansions of hers have mirrors?

  16. Observer 09/12/2007 14:35

    Thank goodness for quotation marks.

    I couldn't express myself without them.

    Now - if I can only train myself to do finger quotes - I'll be a complete asshole instead of a half-assed asshole.

  17. Jesus H. Christ 09/12/2007 14:35

    Is she doing her "Assholio" routine from Ace Ventura?  I'd still put three condoms on and let her blow me.  She's chubby.  It all smooths out when they lay down anyway.

  18. jokerswild 09/12/2007 14:35

    Spiderpig. . .Spiderpig. . . does whatever a spiderpig does!

  19. Pennsylvanias Finest 09/12/2007 14:37

    Fat pig is so politically incorrect. I prefer tuskless oversized boar.

  20. Guinny_Ire 09/12/2007 14:37

    She looks like the almost 40 mom w/3 kids she's dancing to support.

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