BRITNEY AND KFED ARE GOING TO COURT

People magazine says it's already pandemonium in Los Angeles this morning, which is not the same as Panda Madness.  Panda Madness is when the 2008 pandas are on their way, and the 2007s gotta move.  It's Panda Dealin Days.  We must be crazy to have pandas at these prices.  No, pandemonium results when Britney Spears and her hats are ordered to face Kevin Federline in court for the first time, which will happen today around noon, pacific time.

A judge has ordered the ex-couple to appear for a progress-report hearing in their custody battle.L.A. Superior Court Commissioner Scott Gordon will be hearing from various custody experts involved in the case.For now, Federline retains physical custody of sons Preston, 2, and Jayden James, 1. Spears has monitored visitation rights, and with one overnight per week with her children.The judge is not expected to reinstate the 50-50 custody arrangement that was in place before the judge stripped Spears of custody and allowed only visitation."At best, she may get unmonitored visits and more overnight privileges," says family law attorney Scott Weston, who's not involved with either party. "This case is still in the early stages and could go on for months."

This sounds like some phony story cooked up by the liberal media, like when they said I've never been on a date with a girl.  Whatever.  Several of those prostitutes in Thaliand turned out to be girls, and what about the Jessica Alba doll I made with pillows and horsehair?  "Jessica".  That's a GIRLS name.  See what I mean, these magazines just lie.