HAYDEN IS HERE TO HELP

When not masturbating to violent porn or making insane candy, the Japanese enjoy slaughtering dolphins, and the World Series of dolphin slaughtering is now upon us.   Between early October and late December, Japanese fisherman around the village of Taiji drive pods of dolphins into shallow coves, then kill the dolphins by slashing their throats or stabbing them with spears.  Thrashing about, the dolphins take as long as six minutes to die.  The water turns red with their blood and the air fills with their screams.  I also assume they have big Taiji Dolphin Slaughter Holiday mattress sales, with the lowest prices of the year, because that's what we would do in America.  SeaShepherd.org says:

Sea Shepherd is currently in Osaka, Japan working with the international surfing community's efforts to stop the annual dolphin slaughter that claims more than 25,000 intelligent and innocent lives every year in Taiji and adjacent seaside towns and villages.  In one of the bays where thousands of dolphins are killed, 22 people with surfboards and wet suits paddled into the water and formed a prayer circle to honor their memory. After the surfers returned to shore the police asked for passports and took photos of everybody that was there.

So the point to all this is that Hayden Panettiere was one of the protesters and she was prancing around in a bikini.  I'm not sure how getting nerds on the internet to masturbate helps dolphins, but her plan is way better than mine, which mostly involved playing Halo 3 some more and then barbecuing a dolphin.