JESSICA SIMPSON LOVES FOOTBALL, ATTENTION

Jessica Simpson and Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo have been rumored to be dating for a few weeks now, and yesterday she wore his jersey (or at least a pink version) to the Cowboys game against the Eagles.  Keep in mind, the Eagles suck this year (they were 5-8 before yesterday) yet the Cowboys still lost, mostly because Romo went 13-36 with 3 interceptions and no touchdowns.  He also fumbled twice.  In his defense, it's hard to play football when you have a raging hard-on.  It especially makes things awkward when the center bends over and you cuddle up behind him and put your hands an inch from his balls.  Also, who gives a shit about football when you have Jessica Simpson to go home too.  I don't care how cool your job is, if it's between that and Jessica Simpson, fuck it.  You could be a judge at the Victoria's Secret Blowjob Olympics and you'd still just stare at your watch the whole time.  

(i don't know what the deal is with these pictures.  i went to several different sources and they all looked the same.  weird.  it looks like an oil painting.  also, due to a scheduling conflict, the role of "Joe Simpson" was played by Martin Sheen.)