Did you see what I did there? I wrote the headline as a question like this was unbelievable news. Now you're all intrigued and can't stop reading. I'm clever. The New York Daily News says:
Her rep is denying it, but a very good source tells me we can soon expect an engagement announcement from actors Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson.
The couple have been an item for almost a year. Reynolds ended his engagement to fellow Canadian Alanis Morissette last February, and by April he was spotted on a date with Johansson at the Odeon in Tribeca, looking very much in love.
They've been serious for a while and even bought houses within a half mile of each other in the Hollywood Hills (that's Scarletts with the blue tarp - she was getting a new roof - and Ryans is the U shaped beneath it). Which is all the more amazing because damn near every dude in Hollywood has snaked out that trap of hers. I even have a buddy who swears he had a three-some with her once. I had a four-some one time. It was golf, but still, pretty sexy, huh?
(picture source = bauer griffin)
this is her fist marriage right? well who better than van wilder
I thought she was kinda hot for a while…but now…meh.
I love her.
Honestly, she looks like a trailer park one night stand. I mean that in the most sincere and unapologetic way.
i never had a trailer park one night stand that looked even remotely like that.
i must be hanging around the wrong trailer parks
Who cares?
Who is this slut?
god damn it… now she's gonna dump Ryan Reynolds or divorce him or whatever and he'll get all depressed and start lying around crying and stuffing his face with Ho-Hos until he's a big blubbery whale and my eye candy will be ruined. RUINED! thanks a fucking bunch, Scarlett.
You know there is an underground tunnel linking their homes, with many side rooms filled with sexual paraphernalia–because if I were Ryan Reynolds I'd be fucking her in as many places in as many ways as possible.
I heard his favorite is the mirrored room filled with rhesus monkeys, caulking guns and midgets.
This is an upgrade on Alanis Morrisette and Rachael Leigh Cook, I guess.
Bad for us as now that she's married she'll probably moralise over going naked in movies or worse - get knocked up.
NERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS!
if virgins wear white, what color do whores wear?
..that hole in the roof was so that the Naval airforce could drop in to do a gang-bang on Miss Johansson!
(damn, I need a spellcheck)
You know, they filmed Van Wilder on my campus (UCLA), actually in several rooms of my own building. Asshole handlers would try to keep me from going to my own office–and I was like, "Who the fuck are you? Let me get to my office!" Every day they filmed there I was delayed by like 20 minutes so these idiots could make sure I was allowed to go up to my own office. Just to make a stupid one star movie.
Fucking UCLA, sells out to National Lampoon so the Chancellor can give himself a raise.
So is Ryan Reynolds a hypnotist or a worlork or something? Because otherwise I can't align my reality with a world where he's awarded exclusive tapping priveleges to ScarJo.
Pennsylvania's Fines:
I'm guessing something Yellow and Black (Toxic!)
Id hit her and doctress.
NERDS! NERDS! NERDS! NERDS! NERDS! NERDS! NERDS! NERDS! NERDS!
Id hit her and doctress.
Just get me in the temple hard the first blow. That way, I can wake up afterwards and not remember how I prolapsed.