WORST. MOVIE. EVER.

By brendon February 15, 2008 @ 8:49 AM

According to Box Office Mojo, Paris Hiltons new movie, "the Hottie and the Nottie" made a total of 27,696 dollars during the first three days of its release.  It was released on 111 screens, meaning an unthinkable 250 dollars per screen, or roughly 31 people per day.  Now awesome gets awesome, because according to Us magazine…

Paris Hilton's latest film, The Hottie and the Nottie, has ranked dead last by users of IMDb.
The Hottie and the Nottie – with 2,190 low-star votes – now rests at the bottom of the IMDb user charts, even below the American Idol movie, From Justin to Kelly: With Love and Daddy Day Camp.
Four of five of the movies in which Hilton has had starring roles are ranked in IMDb's Bottom 100.

I guess this does look pretty awful although to be honest I never even watched the trailer.  I didn’t even try because I’m pretty sure my computer would have locked up out of protest if I had.  In fact Electricity refuses to even power my computer when I do Paris Hilton stuff.  I have to hook my computer to a stationary bike and pedal to generate a current.  I asked Electricity why it was being so stuck up and it said, “Paris Hilton?  Fuck You, bro.”

wwtdd

(47) Comments

  1. all4ubitch 02/15/2008 09:11

    Yeah…I really hated all of the night vision.  Creeped me out.

  2. all4ubitch 02/15/2008 09:13

    I'm patiently waiting for Willy Wonka to come take her back to the chocolate factory

  3. Otto Man 02/15/2008 09:15

    So documentaries about mentally-retarded syphilis carriers aren't popular?

    Good to know.

  4. loustavern 02/15/2008 09:18

    Electricity says "Paris Hilton? Fuck You, bro."

    loustavern reciprocates…

    Either I can smell that bitch from Vegas all the way on the east coast, or my dog farted. You choose. 

  5. Juan 02/15/2008 09:22

    Oh, those people are so mean. 

    If Paris Hilton wasn't in this movie, it would be acclaimed as a great cinematic milestone, probably better than "Gone With The Wind" and "Citizen Kane."

    But just because it stars Paris "Lazy Eye" Hilton, the haters are out in full force. 

    Don't you all realize that this might jeopardize her plans to make a series of martial arts films where she plays a socialite by day and a masked avenger by night?  And what about the rumor that George Lucas was going to cast her in Star Wars XX: The Clap Strikes Back?  Yeah, you'll be sorry that you ruined her career!!

     

  6. loustavern 02/15/2008 09:22

    Hasn't Marisa Miller done something worth posting about.

    Like breathing? Or needing to know where to get ahold of me? 

    I mean, a brit followed by a Paris, we gotta bring this outlook back up QUICK. 

  7. Juan 02/15/2008 09:24

    Plus, Paris was going to donate the profits from this movie to her home for battered women.

    Now you've gone and ruined everything!  

    If you don't go see this movie, the terrorists win!

    OK, you don't have to see it, just buy a ticket and then go home.

     

  8. Dirty Hairy 02/15/2008 09:25

    I wish someone would make Paris Hilton eat the original print of this film, wait until she shits it out, and then rub her nose in it.

  9. loustavern 02/15/2008 09:29

    Juan, I just went back and actually read the Bai Ling comments, Your Stee Ling joke will not be topped on this site for at least a day or two.

    I will use that at least twice before the day is out. 

  10. That's Hot 02/15/2008 09:33

    Need a LL post with this picture as banner!

    http://www.popoholic.com/photo.php?id=lindsay-lohan-rodeo-03&title=Lindsay%20Lohan 

  11. pat@cegtalent 02/15/2008 09:37

    "The hottie and the ballon knotie"…I didn't realize she was getting back into to porn

  12. pat@cegtalent 02/15/2008 09:38

    Where does IMBd rank a Night in Paris

  13. Pennsylvania's Finest 02/15/2008 09:39

    although i doubt this cunt has figured it out, the film business is like the music business, you can buy yourself a position, but you can't buy success.

    1. failed music career
    2. failed film career

    Porn industry; roll out the dildos and whip cream….here comes paris hilton

     

  14. frankXchange 02/15/2008 09:42

    I’m waiting for the book, braille edition.

  15. Dr Scummm 02/15/2008 09:44

    Here's a 10/10 rating comment for the movie from IMDB: (WARNING: INTENSE IRONY AHEAD)

     

    A Masterpiece — Quite possibly the greatest film of all time. There aren't enough stars to give this amazing feature

    Beautiful. Just beautiful. Not even The Godfather had a message as beautiful and well-put as The Hottie and the Nottie. This is not just a movie–it's an experience. I've never seen such a ridiculously emotion-laden masterpiece.

    The movie starts off with the shallow veneer of most modern MTV-generation films–it's shallow and it apotheosizes the shallowness of contemporary mainstream youth culture. It uses this facade to slowly bring the viewer to consciousness about the world around them. What is beauty? This is a question not easily answered, but the film has several great explanations. Although I am a man, I'll admit that I cried at the end of The Hottie and The Nottie. The fact that his is marketed to the young generation is incredibly, considering the power of it's message.

    10/10 GO SEE THIS MOVIE! NOW!

  16. frankXchange 02/15/2008 09:44

    Judging by the colour of her skin, I’d say she rubbed her whole body over her agent’s face.

  17. Dr. Gonzo 02/15/2008 09:50

    her next feature should be directed by Madonna with a soundtrack by Britney Spears, produced by Lucasfilm Ltd.

     It should premiere in Baghdad, and of course there should be a gala red carpet event with klieg lights and the works.

    i'd watch that shit on tv, writer's strike or no. 

  18. Al Gore 02/15/2008 09:50

    I bet paris barks like a CAT!  Get it!  Cause cats go oink oink, you people are so stoopid

  19. Crunk Panda 02/15/2008 10:01

    I guess I just assumed this was direct to DVD

  20. Al Gore 02/15/2008 10:17

    pandas go MOO

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