By brendon April 14, 2008 @ 10:45 AM

Today, Us magazine breaks the story that Ashlee Simpson is pregnant.  Just last week it was announced that Ashlee is engaged.  What a coincidence!

The singer, 23, is expecting her first child with fiancé Pete Wentz, 28.
Simpson and the Fall Out Boy frontman announced their engagement Wednesday.
"We are thrilled to confirm their engagement and congratulate this happy couple," a spokesperson for the couple told Us. "Beyond that there is nothing to say."
Simpson's rep had no comment.

Aha.  So she's pregnant.  That’s why the rushed wedding.  Stuff like this is why you have to be careful.  Always use protection, and if you’re like me, always take a moment to lay the girls clothes out just as she had them on.  That way you can re-dress her before she wakes up and no one is the wiser.  And that's your Monday, Key To Success!


(84) Comments

  1. avatar
    Paparazzi Sniper 04/14/2008 11:05


  2. avatar
    Slaappy got fingered 04/14/2008 11:06

    Cue Nelson Saying


    "Ha HA" 

  3. avatar
    TW 04/14/2008 11:07

    We know it's not his so guesses anyone?

  4. avatar
    TW 04/14/2008 11:07

    "Anyone?  "

    " v _ _ d _ _ economics. Anyone? "

  5. avatar
    Cornelius 04/14/2008 11:11

    That's gonna be one ugly baby

  6. avatar
    Penis Mightier 04/14/2008 11:12

    I guess the engagement's off…..who's the father?

  7. avatar
    Little Sister 04/14/2008 11:13

    I find it more honest to announce the pregnancy first, THEN announce the engagment. Or at least do both at the same time. If you do it this way you look more like a douche bag. Aren't these people rich? Isn't a box of condoms like $7?

  8. avatar
    pepper 04/14/2008 11:16

      Most Emo babies don't last one month.   SIDS!!!


  9. avatar
    TW 04/14/2008 11:16

    The kid's Abe Froman's. The Chicago Sausage King.

  10. avatar
    Juan 04/14/2008 11:17

    Aha.  So she's pregnant.  That’s why the rushed wedding.

    Jamie Lynn Spears, please read this! 

    Oh, she's "engaged" too?   I guess that takes her and Ashlee off the "slut" list, right?


  11. avatar
    Dirty Hairy 04/14/2008 11:19

    If you're gonna skag it, double-bag it!

  12. avatar
    Juan 04/14/2008 11:19

    Two good 'ol sayings are relevant here.

    One is for Pete:

    a) why buy the cow when milk is free?

    I will abbreviate the other for easy reading:

    Horse gone.   Don't bother closing barn door.



  13. avatar
    pepper 04/14/2008 11:20

       How sad, the emo baby will lip sink his first cry!

  14. avatar
    Juan 04/14/2008 11:21

    If Pete isn't the daddy, that leaves only

    a) K-Fed

    b) Tom Brady

    c) Shawn Kemp


  15. avatar
    Burnsy 04/14/2008 11:21

    This is why Joe Simpson always chooses anal with Jessica.

  16. avatar
    tangocash00001 04/14/2008 11:22

    i hope the baby is black

  17. avatar
    Doctress Leisa 04/14/2008 11:25

    Last week we had a guy come into the station and apply for a DJ position. After he left, the manager in charge of hiring threw his application in the trash. "Why?" I asked. "He seemed nice."

    "Yea, but he put down his favorite band was Fall Out Boy." 

    True story. 

  18. avatar
    sephseph 04/14/2008 11:26

    that guy is a nob my mates got a blog thing, you should check it out -

  19. avatar
    Fuzzy Chipmunk 04/14/2008 11:31

    This child shall be born with eyeliner and Ashleys real nose. 

  20. avatar
    tangocash00001 04/14/2008 11:33

    i wonder if Papa Joe will "manage" the young one? and by manage i mean molest.

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