Her rep denies it, but for about two days now the rumor has been that Jessica Simpson has broken up with Tony Romo. Us magazine is the latest to say they’ve split, and then they pile on by saying she’s still hung up on John Mayer, so much so that Jess got drunk off her ass when she saw the pictures of Mayer with Jennifer Aniston. Us says…
The 27-year-old singer was so out of it after a four-hour session of drinking at L.A.'s Mexicali Cocina Cantina on May 10 – which started at the pre-happy hour of 4 p.m. with BFF CaCee Cobb and her beau Donald Faison – that she was reduced to leaving her Range Rover in the parking lot and calling her mom Tina for a ride home (for good measure, CaCee Cobb threw up under the table); that same night, Us Weekly also reports that beau Tony Romo partied solo in Chicago and was overheard telling friends he was single again.
This is good news, since it opens the window for me to finally be with my beloved Jessica. Tony is a dork. She deserves a handsome stud like me. To learn more about my exciting adventures of passion and karate, check out this months issue of Fantastic Handsome Lover magazine. (full size of that banner pic here.)
Tony Homo is just that
Jessica call me
cunt face
Put her on your hand and work her like a ventriloquist's dummy.
What's the big fucking to do over John Mayer?
guess its back to riding her dad again…..
cabbage cunt
I stopped caring about this the moment I didn't read about it.
Lexi, apparently, some women believe Mayer's body is a wonderland…me, it just makes me wonder…
Wait what? She called for a ride home when she was drunk off her ass? This site will be pretty boring if THAT becomes staus quo in Hollywood.
Jessica if you had B-Cups I wouldn't give a rats ass about ya. But since you have Ds I have to say how sorry I am for you. And what really helps is taking your top off for the world to enjoy.
Jessica's best friend is named "CaCee"?
I bet Jessica is the one who spelled it that way. (She spells her own name "JeSiKA" or just makes an "x" on the dotted line when she signs contracts)
BTW, do you think it's pronounced "Casey" or "Khaki"?
I feel so sorry for Jessica.
Poor little
big boobsrich girl.juan,
i would just call her Cock Cobb and see if she fakes laughter, then donkey punch her jet li style.
Jessica Simpson: Part Woman, Part Photoshop
In super-conservative L.A., 4pm is considered "pre-happy hour?" Where I'm from, "pre-happy hour" is the time between waking up and grabbing your first alcoholic beverage.
4 p.m. is the end of my nap time. then i get to pretend like my girlfriend's lactating and i'm starving for 3 hours. then, i go down on her while she watches vh1 and hopes i don't find the crunchberries down there.
Money can't buy you love.
photoshop or not, it isn't like they are taking a hag and making her super hot. I still believe when she gets wet cream soda comes out of her vagina.
I'd love to see the sex video of Mayer, Simpson and Aniston - (without Mayer)
Us magazine describes her as a singer? Ooo-kay, I guess she's more of a "singer" than an "actress," but it's a close one. If I had to choose a descriptive term for her, I guess I'd pick…
moronic large-hootered cum dumpster.