07.17.2008 TOM IS SHORT. OH I GUESS I WAS WRONG.

Jared has some pictures up today showing a very stately Tom Cruise.  He’s been 5’6” for 20 years but as of last night he’s a damn giant.  Maybe it's forced perspective or whatever but they’re the same height, at best, and last night Katie was wearing 3-inch heels, yet Tom still looks taller.  So this can only mean he’s wearing lifts.  Which is funny.  I hope this is his new thing.  I dream of the day he gets out of the limo and clomps his feet down and sticks his arms out and waves them in big circles to keep his balance as he steps down the red carpet in KISS boots from 1978, all while grinning like an idiot and pretending none of this is happening.


(70) Comments

  1. ososexilexi 07/17/2008 07:45

    Well, isn't she just so avant garde! Only problem is that Melissa Joan-Hart pioneered this Glam-esque Bag Lady look in the 80's on "Clarissa Explains it All".

  2. Mac-Daddy 07/17/2008 07:45

    LIFTS!!!

  3. Avatar 07/17/2008 07:45

    Sometimes I think I'm really crazy and need a good shot of whatever they gave Nicholson in One Flew, but, shit, Cruise is the real deal when it comes to lunacy. Check out those photos: could anybody appear more out of control behind that dead face of his than him??? Yes, his (fake)wife. She's terrifying. Pod-people.  

  4. Evil Malcom Norris 07/17/2008 07:45

    They sure like to compete for the goofiest haircut award.

  5. The Ghost of Deano 07/17/2008 07:47

    jesus he must be walking on the tippy ends of his toes

  6. TW 07/17/2008 07:48

    She's still a fucking hottie. I'd love to remove that drug-induced smirk from her face and vagina. Thanks. "Goodnight, Detröit. We love you!"

  7. Lance @ FilmDrunk 07/17/2008 07:49

    He looks like he just threw a pitch in the 1910 World Series.

  8. Smeg McMuffin 07/17/2008 07:50

    Some chicks can rock the short hair look, but Katie ain't one of them. 

  9. Silverback 07/17/2008 07:50

    Anyone click on that Tom Cruise 25 Years ad by accident ? Straightened my shit right out. I got nothing for Tom these days.

  10. Mac-Daddy 07/17/2008 07:51

    She is still very cute! I'd poke her ass!

    I can hear Tom now…..'YOU WILL CONTINUE TO SLOUCH AS TO NOT LOOK TALLER THEN ME OR I WILL CHOP YOUR LEGS OFF AT THE KNEE, FOR I AM XENU!!!"

  11. Alan 07/17/2008 07:52

    Letterman: How is your life different?

    Kidman:  I can wear heels now.

    Pow.

  12. Mongro Jackson 07/17/2008 07:52

    I used to jerk off to Clarissa. Nice name drop Lexi.

  13. someoneluvsu 07/17/2008 07:53

    Silly Thetans, Tommy can control time and space and make himself any height he wants to be.

     

  14. dirtydiane 07/17/2008 07:53

    Aren't they just the picture of wedded bliss?

  15. ososexilexi 07/17/2008 07:54

    Why would you even bother doing your hair and make up when you're going to leave the house wearing a get up like that? Looks like something a person suffering from multiple personality disorder would wear to her psychiatric intake evaluation.

  16. graller 07/17/2008 07:56

    What the hell is she wearing? Baggy 80's jeans rolled up with leopard skin heels and she is still hot

  17. lady garden 07/17/2008 07:58

    i think his legs actually end at the knees

  18. ososexilexi 07/17/2008 07:58

    Yeah, graller. Hot for brainwashing & the sensory depravation chamber that Tom built for her.

  19. murraymaker 07/17/2008 08:02

    I don't care about Tom, all I know is that Maggie Gyllenhaal sucked in The Dark Knight. She's ugly, has a horrible voice and can't replace Katie. I saw it last night. You can read my review on my myspace blog.

     www.myspace.com/murraymakerinc

     

     

  20. dirtydiane 07/17/2008 08:04

    Did she seriously just "french roll" her jeans?  GTFO.  Ah mah gawd!

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