LINDSAYS RELATIONSHIP IS GOING GREAT

Yesterday E! reported that Lindsay Lohans GF Samantha Ronson was in talks to write her biography, a plan that didn’t sit too well with Lindsay's dad.  

"I've shut up about this long enough," Michael said. "She's using my daughter. People never even knew who Samantha Ronson was until she met Lindsay. She was just some L.A. DJ. And now she's writing a book? I am at wit's end with this stuff. This is not in Lindsay's best interest."

To which Lindsay replied:

“He’s out of control. I want him to stop hurting and talking to the media about the people I love."

And now Samantha has chimed in as well, writing this on her myspace:

SHUT THE F*** UPCurrent mood: bulliedi really don't want to say anything because i feel like he wins- he, being the man who is so desperate for attention that he goes to the media whenever possible- i know i am being used, i am just a pawn- easy to sacrifice in order to feed his addiction. I was angry when i first read his attack on me, but- for me- i believe that actions speak louder than words… so now i just pity him- i am not standing in his way- i am not the reason that he has no contact with his daughter- he is- his need to throw a tantrum for the whole world to hear is- i am not going to go into a play by play defense- i feel no need to publicly defend my role in lindsay's life- i'm just sorry that she likes me more than him.p.s. i'm not the one that is so lost that i need to use my relationship with lindsay to earn a living…. i am, always will and always have been here for her for her- not for anything else….so I think it's safe to say that there is not now and never will be a tell all….. written by me….. when does your book come out mr. lohan?

Eh, whatever.  These whores are getting boring fast, and Lindsay is ugly now so I kind of don’t even care.  What I do care about is that someone took all the vanilla at Starbucks this morning.  Damn you!  A pox on the scoundrel who took my precious vanilla!