MICHAEL PHELPS IS F’N AMAZING

By brendon August 21, 2008 @ 9:31 AM

Billy Bushs indomitable spirit brings joy to America's heart, but he may have just made an enemy in Samantha Ronsom.  She’s met him, probably thought she knew him, but nothing would prepare her for what would happen next.  Access Hollywood says…

Back in Athens in 2004, we asked Michael which Hollywood celebrity he’d most like to meet.
“Lindsay Lohan,” he told us then. “She’s pretty hot.”
Well, Billy Bush reached out Lindsay for messages to Michael during the Beijing games.
Earlier in the week, Lindsay told Billy to tell Michael, “Good Luck.”
So what did Lindsay tell Billy today to say to Michael, following his 8th gold medal win?
“Tell him he’s (expletive) amazing, and I want to meet him.”

Yeah Lindsay is gonna hit that.  She watched him do that butterfly kick underwater and hatched her plan right then.  She hasn’t gotten any in months, so try not to stare if you see her next week with a cold Bud Light can pressed against her crotch.

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123 Comments

(123) Comments

  1. scum 08/21/2008 10:14

    Boring

  2. Slaappy got fingerbanged 08/21/2008 10:15

    You know his Mom will "cock block" this so called hook up, right?

  3. scum 08/21/2008 10:15

    I'd hit it first with my fist.

  4. Believedat07 08/21/2008 10:17

    world record for firecrotchary

  5. scum 08/21/2008 10:17

    Sam would cock block it with the back of herhis head.

  6. LonghornMike 08/21/2008 10:17

    Can you still swim with a rotten fuckstick? I would think his dick helps stabilize him when he's swimming, like a rudder on a boat. Having said that, even a guy as tall as Phelps can probably swim laps in her vaginal canal.

  7. snappy.vajayjay 2.0 08/21/2008 10:18

    How do you know she hasn't gotten any in months? You know Sam is packing something to keep that bitch satisfied.

  8. Zack 08/21/2008 10:19

    Well, unlike the last unfortunate soul who dove into the gaping chasm that is all that remains of Lindsay's vagina, at least Phelps won't drown.

  9. MG Admirer 08/21/2008 10:19

    She's interested not in his medals, but the recently revealed fact that Phelps has double-jointed elbows, feet, knees and hands.  Imagine the possibilities.

  10. Terd Ferguson 08/21/2008 10:22

    I think he should probably bring in the rest of his relay team to satisfy that bitch.  Especially the kneegrow.

  11. Mizz Party Panties 08/21/2008 10:24

    Imagine the possibilities…

    Ohh, I’m imagining….

    Excuse me folks, I have to go…

    BRB

  12. scum 08/21/2008 10:26

    " so try not to star if you see her next week with a cold bud light Stampede Light Plus can pressed against her crotch"

  13. scum 08/21/2008 10:27

    stare.

  14. MaxwellDemon 08/21/2008 10:27

    He will definitely finish first.

  15. Lightdragon 08/21/2008 10:31

    She He will definitely finish first.

    Fixed

  16. Mongro Jackson 08/21/2008 10:32

    If anyone has a chance of swimming out of that vagina when he gets sucked in, it's Michael Phelps. 

  17. The Ghost of Deano 08/21/2008 10:34

    If I were him, this is one pool I wouldnt swim in, not without a good dose of chlorine anyway…

  18. The Fried Man 08/21/2008 10:34

    Michael, swim as fast as you can away from that poisonous vagina.

  19. The Ghost of Deano 08/21/2008 10:36

    funny thing is, a couple years ago everyone wanted to hook up with LiLo in order to get some publicity.  Now LiLo is looking to hook up with others for the same purposes.

    Love irony.  Love it.

  20. Mizz Party Panties 08/21/2008 10:36

    Ok, Im back. What I wanted to say is " Imagine the possibilities of ME and Phelps together….."

    But the deal is off if she gets her filthy firecrotch on him first.

    I swear If I ever see her I will mop the floor with her

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