YES YES YES PLEASE GOD YES

Despite this idea being sheer madness on every level, the National Enquirer says CBS is in secret (shhhh!) talks with Paula Abdul for her to do her own talk show.  Be prepared to clinch your fists and hate life when you see how much she makes a year on American Idol by the way.  

 “Paula’s been dreaming about having her own talk show for three years, and she’s ready to make it a reality,” a source close to the star told The ENQUIRER.Paula envisions the new show focusing on issues that affect average people — plus an occasional celebrity guest, says the source.As The ENQUIRER exclusively reported last week, Paula is renegotiating her current contract with “AI” execs and is asking to double her salary.She will earn from $5 million to $7 million, but feels she’s worth $10 million. If she doesn’t get it, she will put the wheels of her talk show in motion immediately, says the source.

This is a solid idea, because Paula Abdul is a mumbling incoherent drunken mess who nobody likes.  She’s not funny, smart or insightful.  Really the perfect choice for a talk show if you think about it.