Earlier this week there was a rumor that Mickey Rourke was now “dating” Courtney Love. Which apparently is news to Mickey Rourke, who told TMZ last night that he’d rather "be on a deserted island with a gorilla" than Love. When asked for a comment, Jennifer Love Hewitt said, well yeah, obviously, because the monkey would just eat the bananas and stuff, but Courtney would probably want some of the cake. Then someone explained that "deserted" meant "abandoned", not "frosted". It doesn't mean "turned into a dessert". And she said, what, no, no you take that back. TAKE IT BACK!
(Is Mickey grinding on Thandie Newton and then rubbing his balls? Of course he is. Why wouldn’t he be?)