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um, is she okay

April 30, 2009 | celebrity | editor | 0 Comments

Lindsay is still in Hawaii as of today, although God knows how she’s paying for this.  I asked the dude I know if the porn producer who loaned her the Maserati is bankrolling this and he said he didn’t know.  That was a good story wasn’t it?  The key to a good story is to present hope to the listener but then never go anywhere with it.  These rumors may hurt Lindsay’s reputation, but so will stumbling out of the shadows looking like she just got roughed up by a john.  Violence is not the answer, even if the sex is disappointing.  You need to communicate with your lover.  Like if a girl is no good at oral, I thump her in the forehead with my finger and say, “do it better.”

(image source = pacific coast)

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