Will.I.Am and Perez Hilton have both issued statements today concerning the incident this weekend in Toronto, and I’m sure it’s just coincidence, but Will.I.Am’s statement is 172 words long, and he uses I, me or my 4 times. Once every 43 words.
Hilton’s statement is 411 words long, and he uses I, me or my 41 times. Over 10 percent of his statement is I, me or my.
Hilton’s statement (read it here) is allegedly an apology, but he does not apologize for lying on twitter when he wrote that Will.I.Am assaulted him, he does not apologize for screaming “you’re a fucking faggot” at Will.I.Am, and he specifically does not apologize to GLAAD, who earlier this week criticized his use of offensive gay slurs. To be honest it’s not entirely clear what he is apologizing for. He does however manage to work in two compliments to himself. He’s a class act.
“I am sorry that any good work I have done for promoting equality may be tainted by me reclaiming a hurtful word…”
“I am apologizing to the gay community, to anyone who was hurt by my choice of words, and to all the people who have ever emailed me to thank me for all that I have done to fight for gay rights over the last few years.”
Will.I.Am takes a slightly different approach (read it here)…
“I will not continue to comment specifically on the incident that happened in Toronto last weekend… But I would hate for my silence to be misconstrued… I do not condone harassment or violence of any kind…
No one deserves physical abuse…
And no one deserves verbal abuse…
Everyone needs to be respected…”
I hope Wills incendiary language doesn’t set Perez off again. You have to tread very lightly or he’ll scream at you. It’s like dealing with a rabid monkey.
“It’s like dealing with a rabid monkey.”
I now know whom they used as inspiration for the Evil Monkey on Family Guy…
So many fucking words.
Stark, I can’t wait around for Fury to show up. I need your help now.
I have also been unable to contact my beautiful partner 99. Any help will be much appreciated. Thanks.
You can all say what you want about Pamela, but I’d eat 10 football field lengths of shit covered placenta to fuck every hole on her being.
“I am sorry that any good work I have done for promoting equality may be tainted by me reclaiming a hurtful word…”
too bad his mother could not have reclaimed PH’s dad’s inferior sperm from her vagina prior to becoming impregnated…
Perez is a worthless excuse for a human being.
DB eats pieces of shit for breakfast
i like this take on it…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cn2UVksGmU
Man, you give a black man a perfectly good white name and he’s gotta go fuck it all up with punctuation & shit.
87, I can offer up a plateful of Wendy’s Baconator sandwiches if you thank that would help. Fist.
The definition of apology Flaming Douchebag P prefers to an act of contrition…
“An apology is a justification or defense of an act or idea, from the Greek apologia (απολογία).”
PH makes me angry that I have a silent (P)…
FFOE, Control’s computers indicate that you have the smallest IQ on this site. I am reaching out to more of this site’s intellectual elite. Thanks.
87, your Control computers are right on the money. Do they indicate if he is legally retarded?
Luckily, Control has an entire division monitoring Perez’s actions at this moment. If he continues to provoke anyone else, we have the capabilities to take action.
And you’re the one roleplaying like a fuckin LARP faggot on a celebrity snark site. Kill yourself.
87, are you talking the Barbara Feldon Agent 99 or the Anne Hathaway soulless stare Agent 99?
If it’s the Feldon version I’ll keep an eye out… Hathaway version, not so much.
I’ll have to call in backup. We may have identified a suspect in Watt. Please explain your handle Watt.
Why do people continue to call this worthless fat gay fuck by his contrived fake ass pen name. Who the fuk told him perez was a good choice? From now on I’m not going to give this talentless overrated drama queen the satisfaction of calling him/her by his pseudo moniker. This annoyingly flamboyant and vapid queers name is Mario. That’s what i will call him form now on. By the name that is on his certificate. He has absolutely nothing to do with the hilton family and he is retarded for choosing that last name.
Hathaway is in my bed