07.15.2009 Kendra is hot, mistaken

Last week Kendra was on here because of her kick ass taste of golf outfits, and a few hours later she posted about that on her page. She said I was devastatingly handsome and the thought of me gets her all hot. That was the gist of it. I think. To be honest I didn’t read the whole thing.

Point being, today she answers an email question, “how long should you wait until you have sex?”

Then, presumably because of some computer error, she accidentally writes, “if it takes 5, 10 or even 15 dates, then that is absolutely ok too!”

Obviously that answer is insane. The last girl I was involved with made me wait until the fifth date until she would have sex with me.  Which was extremely frustrating.  Because she was a prostitute.  And then at the end of our sixth date she told me just wanted to be friends.

I learned a valuable lesson.  Women are all nuts of course, but everyone already knows.  No the lesson here was that it should never take more than three dates to have sex.  Three.  That’s the answer.  Anything more is a bad sign.  Actually it’s not a sign, it’s a light.  A green light.  It means get the hell out of there.

Look, we’re not 14 and getting to know the pleasures of life.  When a man and a women are attracted to each other, they have sex.  Period.  I don’t care what you’re insane reason is for not having sex.  I’m not a social worker, I’m not here to help, and whatever it is, I’m 100 percent positive it’s only the tip of your insane iceberg.  It’s not like the penis has a bunch of sharp edges to it.  Sex is fun.  Lighten the hell up.