09.04.2009 Michael has beenb laid top rest

reval

The program made it clear that the funeral for Michael Jackson would begin promptly at 7, good news for people like 77-year-old Elizabeth Taylor as they waited around in the blazing California heat. Just 90 minutes later the Jackson family arrived and the service began. Gladys Knight sang the hymn, “Our Father” and Michaels three children placed a bejeweled crown on his golden casket, a crown that Joe would later spend the night digging up.

Al Sharpton was nice enough to update his twitter page during the event, a star-studded affair attended Elizabeth Taylor, Barry Bonds (really?), Macaulay Culkin, Mila Kunis, Chris Tucker, Corey Feldman and Lisa Marie Presley among others.

After the service friends and family gathered at a restaurant in Pasadena, where Feldman did a quick Michael Jackson impression as a tribute. He put on a white sheet and rattled some chains while saying “boo”. Seems inappropriate.

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65 Comments

(65) Comments

  1. TheOverrated 09/04/2009 12:06

    good morning :)

  2. Death to Finkle! 09/04/2009 12:07

    Have they announced a date for Mike Rowe’s funeral yet?

  3. RemSteale 09/04/2009 12:10

    God-Damn you Pepper for mentioning MJ

  4. DB's Treasure 09/04/2009 12:10

    Why can’t Al Sharpton be next?

  5. Uncle Paul 09/04/2009 12:11

    Damn you Finkle you scared me for a second. Had to go to Yahoo answers to make sure your dirty rumor mongering wasn’t true.

  6. RedRage 09/04/2009 12:14

    Please, please, please tell me Mila Kunis isn’t dating MJ’s old cock cushion Macaulay Culkin.

  7. Veracity 09/04/2009 12:15

    That kid is fucking Scary looking. Even fame won’t get that kid laid.

  8. Dirty Dirt Mcgirk 09/04/2009 12:16

    Z, as sure of it you may be, I am not Pepper. You can keep going on believing this delusion, convincing yourself that you yet again solved the biggest mystery on wwtdd.com, all by yourself. Amazing.

  9. Death to Finkle! 09/04/2009 12:16

    She has identified herself in interviews as a fan of the online computer game World of Warcraft and has received a certain amount of attention from the game’s fan community as a result. She has not released what server she is in but says she is with her close friends in the Alliance.[13] Her boyfriend Macaulay Culkin plays too.

  10. Zombie 09/04/2009 12:16

    RedRage, it’s true. I saw a behind-the-scenes look at Forgetting Sarah Marshall (starring Mila), and there were clips of the 2 canoodling together during breaks.

  11. Death to Finkle! 09/04/2009 12:17

    (Insert Home Alone face here)

  12. Veracity 09/04/2009 12:17

    I’m gunna make an alter ego and call it Salt..

    Just cuz

  13. Zombie 09/04/2009 12:18

    McGirk, leave it on the last thread bitch. We’ll duel again when this one gets a few pages deep.

  14. Dirty Dirt Mcgirk 09/04/2009 12:19

    Ok, the fucker is dead and finally buried. Npd, I beg of you and all the other writers at fat penguin, PLEASE, PLEASE, MY GOD FUCKING PLEASE NO MORE MICHAEL JACKSON POSTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  15. Veracity 09/04/2009 12:19

    Someone should tell her that she is MILA KUNIS!

    Why dear lord, WHY Macaulay..

    What the fuck is a Macaulay anyway?

  16. RedRage 09/04/2009 12:19

    Well, at least they can take turns being the power bottom.

  17. pepper 09/04/2009 12:20

    Zombie, DDM is full of shit. We are the one and the same….
    .
    .
    WTF Brend*n, enough with the MJ shit, let is rest!

  18. Death to Finkle! 09/04/2009 12:21

    How long has he been dead?

    Bet the corpse is still fresher than Doc’s cunt.

  19. Dirty Dirt Mcgirk 09/04/2009 12:21

    Sure Zombie, whatever is most convenient for you, I know you have a lot of idiotic harassment and insults to dish out, I will quietly wait for you to have enough time to fit me into your busy, busy schedule.

  20. DB's Treasure 09/04/2009 12:22

    WAIT!

    .

    ..

    …Michael Jackson’s dead?

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