paddingtons sex tape is here

(UPDATE – the links had to be taken down, so now this whole thing is kind of pointless. I would just skip it if I were you.)

I’m waiting for the books-on-tape version, but for everyone who wanted the movie version, the Shauna Sands sex tape went on sale yesterday.  Or if you knew where to look it was available for free yesterday + 30 seconds. I can’t host that kind of thing on a delightful site like Tyler, but lots of people have links where you can download full scenes.

Here is one of those links now, for example (NOTE – please understand this is not a preview or a clip, but a very NSFW full scene from a sex tape.  No one under 18 can download this, because it’s illegal, and also because it would make the baby Jesus cry). In this scene, the penis of Shauns boyfriend appears to have suffered a burn of some kind.  So Shauna drips ice cream on it to cool it down. Her first aid completed, she then licks it off, because that’s perfectly good ice cream, and she’s not made of money you know.

Here is a link to download only the thrilling conclusion of that very same clip, and I don’t want to ruin the surprise ending, but it turns out that Shauna is a very good girl, and an excellent role model for all the girls who go out with me.