12.01.2009 hollywood is run by idiots

A few years ago, a director named Kerry Conran spent 4 years on his Mac making a 6-minute trailer about giant robot war machines. A famous producer saw the footage, and that trailer became the movie, ‘Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow’. It lost $80 million.

A few years after that, director Michael Davis made a 17-minute reel of animated footage showing different action scenes that he wanted to turn into a movie. The ideas were stupid, but so is Hollywood so New Line gave him a bunch of money and those drawings became ‘Shoot Em Up’. It lost $52 million.

52 is less than 80, so sensing that this was moving in the right direction, Hollywood will try the same idea once again. The LA Times says…

When Federico Alvarez came to Hollywood two weeks ago, he was a total unknown.
After seeing his short film, which depicts an invasion of Montevideo by a battalion of giant robots, Mandate Pictures agreed to bankroll a $30-million upcoming film for Alvarez, with the filmmaker getting a cool $1 million director’s fee.
Alvarez also made the rounds of the talent agencies and ended up leaving town with a CAA agent team as well as a deal with Anonymous Content to represent him for commercials. Most important, Alvarez also came away with an A-list Hollywood godfather, “Spider-Man” director Sam Raimi, who will serve as a mentor and producer, through his Ghost House Pictures, on Alvarez’s first American film.

So it would seem they forgot that they already tried this once with giant robots. Which means they probably forgot they tired this with drawings too. Which is why I’ve already started on 17 minutes of drawings. It’s like ‘300′. Except it’s girls. And it’s just one, and she’s naked. And not fighting. So, basically, nothing like ‘300′, but once they hear ‘300′ those dipshits will get so excited they’ll start handing me their wallets and car keys.

(104) Comments

  1. Observer 12/01/2009 15:10

    Finally…..

    ….some Figz…..

    …we were starved…………………….

  2. DB's Treasure 12/01/2009 15:11

    the fuck!?

  3. SuperB 12/01/2009 15:15

    tooo…many…..words…..

  4. Observer 12/01/2009 15:15

    How the fuck did “Shoot Em Up” lose money?

  5. Observer 12/01/2009 15:16

    Tooo……few……naked chicks…….

  6. whatizdat 12/01/2009 15:17

    What did that say?

  7. RedRage 12/01/2009 15:17

    I’ll ask again. Does anyone have an extra suitcase nuke lying around? Hollywood would look better as a smoking crater!

  8. SuperB 12/01/2009 15:19

    off to get jaime sommers’ed….everyone play nice :)

  9. whatizdat 12/01/2009 15:20

    RR had a girlfriend that was a massage therapist also, nice tricks they can do with their body, no? Just be careful on and around the massage table or you may live one of LNOJ’s snappin the frame action!

  10. Rokan 12/01/2009 15:20

    I thought Hollywood was a smoking crater.

  11. SomeoneluvsU 12/01/2009 15:21

    I have this sketch of a robot on a Wendy’s napkin.
    Where do I pick up the check for 30 Mill?

  12. pepper 12/01/2009 15:21

    it needs some periods………………

  13. SomeoneluvsU 12/01/2009 15:23

    Good luck Sup.
    (will the new parts come with the awesome sound effects?)

  14. Rusty Sanchez 12/01/2009 15:25

    I dunno, that ass in someoneluvsU’s avi looks like a smokin crater.

  15. DB's Treasure 12/01/2009 15:25

    Is SupB heading to get bukake’d?

  16. SuperB 12/01/2009 15:26

    I hope so someone….that would be rocking!

  17. SCUM 12/01/2009 15:26

    Wheres my shirt?

  18. Rusty Sanchez 12/01/2009 15:26

    Hi Sup, Bye Sup.

  19. SomeoneluvsU 12/01/2009 15:27

    Thank you Rusty.
    DB and I are big supporters of the Ms Reef contest.

  20. SuperB 12/01/2009 15:27

    I have been having this reoccuring dream the last few nights they put me under, then go all high school shame on me and draw like a hitler moustache on me while im under…

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