01.28.2010 detective handsome has cracked the case

Brittany Murphy cracks a smile and kisses her husband at the air

Simon Monjack announced yesterday that he will file a wrongful death lawsuit against Warner Brothers, claiming they killed his wife Brittany Murphy by firing her from ‘Happy Feet 2’. He told the press…

“Does anyone here know … how to get the lids off these pudding cups? Because I’m pulling the tab, you can see the tab here, and all it does is pull away a strip of the foil down the middle. And then when I go to dip the sausage into it, it doesn’t fit in the pudding, and I have to, like, tear away the rest of the foil. Usually with a fork. A fork does the trick.”

You know what let’s just see what the Sun had to say instead.

SIMON MONJACK puts the 32-year-old’s fatal December heart attack down to the stress she suffered after Hollywood bigwigs scrapped her contract just two weeks before her demise.
He said: “They killed her. She was devastated.”

Really because I heard it was drugs.

“She has never, and I repeat NEVER, done drugs. Not a line of cocaine, not a hit from a joint, nothing. She was anti-drugs. There are no drugs involved.”

He must mean other than the mountain of prescription drugs in her nightstand when she died. This may be news to Monjack, but drugs are a form of drugs. The judge should take this case, look the paperwork over, call Monjack up to the bench, and then just punch him right in the face.

(source = splash news online)


(49) Comments

  1. Slaappy 01/28/2010 12:11

    My condolences to you Observer!

  2. pepper 01/28/2010 12:11

    Junkies live in denial….no surprise…

  3. Dirty Dirt Mcgirk 01/28/2010 12:11

    this bitch was a cocaine dyson, who’s he kidding?!?!?!

  4. Dirty Dirt Mcgirk 01/28/2010 12:12

    i’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:

    Junkies die, that’s what they do. Nothing shocking about a dead junkie.

  5. pepper 01/28/2010 12:13

    What happened to Observer?

  6. Observer 01/28/2010 12:13

    Slaappy???

  7. pepper 01/28/2010 12:14

    Just got here…it took me 90 minutes to go 15 miles….cars were all over the road from the ice and snow….

  8. Observer 01/28/2010 12:14

    Everything good has happened so far, I’m told…..

  9. Observer 01/28/2010 12:15

    SNOW???

    Pepper WTF….it was just 56 degrees the other day…..

    ….I was going to open my pool this weekend…

  10. Olaf Metal 01/28/2010 12:16

    You gotta really suck to get fired from a fucking cartoon. Maybe she was too fat

  11. Slaappy 01/28/2010 12:17

    I see you figured out how your wife died, see above story

  12. AnimalStamina 01/28/2010 12:20

    what a disgusting shit-bag.

  13. RemSteale 01/28/2010 12:21

    Well, I guess he realises his meal ticket is gone now….

  14. whatizdat 01/28/2010 12:23

    Glad u made it Pepper, everywhere is a disaster, I have an 11 minute ride to my store, took an hour. Good thing it was only a snow shower

  15. RedRage 01/28/2010 12:24

    Ice and snow? You can keep it. There is green grass and not a snowflake to be found up here. I can’t remember another year where people were still riding motorcycles at the end of January.

    Did she lose a bloody bet or something? How did this fat, balding, ghost pale pant load end up with BM? I’ll bet $1000 she overdosed trying to burn the image of him naked from her brain.

  16. Observer 01/28/2010 12:25

    The only drug my wife is addicted to are beef injections…..

    ….and I provide at least 1/3 of her “fix”…..

  17. RemSteale 01/28/2010 12:27

    Daddy issues Red, daddy issues

  18. pepper 01/28/2010 12:28

    whatisdat, you should have seen 684 from 84 to Katonah…about 40 cars on the side……..

  19. Slaappy 01/28/2010 12:29

    But this guy is such an astute observer, I thought it was you… Sorry about the confusion

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