jesse james is really sorry

By brendon March 18, 2010 @ 5:20 PM


Sandra Bullock moved out of their house when she found out her husband Jesse James was cheating on her, but he’s acting as if there might be some hope for their marriage. He was seen this morning wearing his wedding ring, and now he’s issued an apology to People.

“The vast majority of the allegations reported are untrue and unfounded. Beyond that, I will not dignify these private matters with any further public comment.
“There is only one person to blame for this whole situation, and that is me. It’s because of my poor judgment that I deserve everything bad that is coming my way.
“This has caused my wife and kids pain and embarrassment beyond comprehension and I am extremely saddened to have brought this on them. I am truly very sorry for the grief I have caused them. I hope one day they can find it in their hearts to forgive me.”

Well, look, I think this guy is an idiot, but that is very definitely an apology. When someone says “I deserve everything bad that is coming my way”, he knows he’s fucked up and he’s not pretending like what he did was ok. So you can’t beat him up over this. But will it work? Who knows. Lots of unanswered questions. Such as, aren’t Jesse and his sleeves and “choppers” due back in the 90s? Is he allowed to stay here in our time? How does that work?

(148) Comments

  1. avatar
    Jessica 03/18/2010 17:25

    My friend told me It’s where many highly successful people are in search of someone for a quality relationship in their life, the same as you:)

  2. avatar
    Barbarella 03/18/2010 17:30

    What no returning to buddism? lol

  3. avatar
    oy 03/18/2010 17:38

    fuck, jessica was 1st……that cunt!
    since sandra’s biological grandfather clock is ticking….i’d like to volunteer my egg inseminating services at her earliest convenience …

  4. avatar
    oy 03/18/2010 17:41

    two things that went wrong w/ this story – unless you’re busted with your dick in her ass, deny EVERYTHING! (that dipshit tiger used his cell…. dumb fuck deserves the hell he gets)
    Sandy’s dumber than that dipshit Jessie cause she knew he was a no good dipshit before she married him….but i regress…

  5. avatar
    Habitual Line Stepper 03/18/2010 17:42

    Screwing over the woman who is a gorgeous world-famous oscar winning actress, that happened to be raising his children, and has 84 million dollars … for a tattoo skank whore? I’ll bet he’s sorry … I’ll be he will get progressively sorry-er as it really hits him too … You don’t have to live in one to be Stupid Trailer Trash .. Jesse James is an idiot.

  6. avatar
    pepper 03/18/2010 17:44

    Fucking Brend*n …always late on the news………….

  7. avatar
    huge-quickly-bye 03/18/2010 17:45

    Yeah, Jessica is right. This blurb could have been better used as another Heidi Montag update. I don’t know if you guys know this or not, but that whore has big tits.

  8. avatar
    ohmwrecker 03/18/2010 17:48

    “So you can’t beat him up over this.”

    Yes, I can.

  9. avatar
    pepper 03/18/2010 17:48

    I might have ESPN or something……..

  10. avatar
    Olaf Metal 03/18/2010 17:48

    South Park missed him by like 1 day

  11. avatar
    Chicago_animal 03/18/2010 17:51

    Sandy should have went all Elin Woods over his ass!

  12. avatar
    ohmwrecker 03/18/2010 17:55

    I never really understood this relationship anyway. Jesse James is a HUGE douche, for sure, but Sandra Bullock has really terrible taste in men. Matthew McConaughey, Bob Schneider . . . I can’t remember any others, but isn’t that bad enough?!

  13. avatar
    SCUM 03/18/2010 18:04

    I read that his dog ran away as well.

  14. avatar
    Barbarella 03/18/2010 18:05

    Douchey as he is… I’m a Jesse James fan.

    It must be the California in me talking. I’m surrounded by Harleys & sleeve tats on a daily basis. LOL

  15. avatar
    SCUM 03/18/2010 18:07

    Hey Pepper, you’re childhood hero Fess Parker is dead.

  16. avatar
    pepper 03/18/2010 18:08

    SCUM…Sandra may be ugly ..but she is not a dog……

  17. avatar
    SCUM 03/18/2010 18:09

    Pretty much every dude I have met that rides a Harley has been a meathead.

  18. avatar
    Zombie 03/18/2010 18:09

    Remember watching Demolition Man and getting anxious to see Sandra naked while she was having digital sex with Stallone? Sadly it didn’t happen… but then came Fire On The Amazon.

  19. avatar
    ohmwrecker 03/18/2010 18:09

    Yeah, because dudes covered in tats and riding motorcycles only occurs in California. Barbie, were you dropped on your head as a child?

  20. avatar
    Barbarella 03/18/2010 18:11

    SCUM, my boyfriend isn’t a meathead… in fact he could use a couple months at the gym. lol

    Ohm, not that I know of. Cocaine is a helluve a drug.

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