the vanilla gorilla (update!)

By brendon March 26, 2010 @ 6:54 PM


Jesse James is an idiot, so I refuse to accept the possibility that Michelle Bombshell gave him the nickname ‘Vanilla Gorilla’ because he has a big dick. More likely is that he still has this Halloween costume that he wore back in 2004, seven months before he and Sandra Bullock got married. So presumably this is where the nickname came from. And it’s why my costume this year will be called “Dongzilla”.

RACIST UPDATE - A friend pointed out that Jesse has companies named Vanilla Gorilla LLC, Way Fast Whitey LLC, and Mighty Whitey LLC. And he was banging a white supremacist Nazi. And the West Coast Choppers logo is an Iron Cross, which is a symbol for many things of course, but was also a medal given by the German army up through WWII. Rommel and Goring won it, for example. Oh but I’m sure this is all just coincidence.

(124) Comments

  1. avatar
    Lord Helmet 03/26/2010 17:55

    fuck you SALAJ

  2. avatar
    Barbarella 03/26/2010 17:56


  3. avatar
    D. Znuts 03/26/2010 17:59


  4. avatar
    SALAJ 03/26/2010 18:00

    If you are looking for a partner based on lifestyle and physical chemistry as well as personal beliefs and common interests, you may try ** ––** Good Luck:)

  5. avatar
    SCUM 03/26/2010 18:02

    Pepper, can I have my purse back? I have to smack someone upside the head.

  6. avatar
    pepper 03/26/2010 18:03

    SCUM, which one did you leave this time….?

  7. avatar
    Woodsman 03/26/2010 18:21

    Good on Dennis Hopper for getting out there. Too bad he can’t go out after the ceremony chasing poon with Jack.

  8. avatar
    pepper 03/26/2010 18:23

    Woodsman, it looks like Jack brought the poon to Dennis…….too young?

  9. avatar
    harm 03/26/2010 19:13

    Gorillas actually have small dicks. 3 inches long, I think. Maybe that is big for some dudes.

  10. avatar
    myocardial encephalogram 03/26/2010 20:25

  11. avatar
    Habitual Line Stepper 03/26/2010 21:19

    … and then after many moons … The elephant came out of the enchanted jungle and found the Albino Gorilla’s emails … She was very angry and banished him back down to the sad dirty dysfunctional gutter from whence he came …

    And THAT kids, how the stupid grease monkey lost his balls.

    (not to mention a super hot wife, who won a best actress oscar, and has 84 million dollars, and was happily bringing up his pornspawn children in a happy home)

    The moral of the story?
    What a fucking stupid grease monkey.

    The End.

  12. avatar
    BigEyeFish1 03/26/2010 21:49

    HLS – pure quality, that. Well done.

  13. avatar
    tblaney6591 03/26/2010 22:44

    The shit us guys do for pussy…. dang!

  14. avatar
    TheWhiteyBrown 03/26/2010 23:46

    and the problem is?

  15. avatar
    zencat002 03/27/2010 00:08

    She’s an idiot who gets what she deserves. “You knew I was a snake when you brought me home, bitch,” Oldest story in thebook,

  16. avatar
    laguna beach baby 03/27/2010 02:13

    wow. amazing how sandra never knew she was married to a white supremest. she’s a two-faced, racist, cunt.

  17. avatar
    Silverback 03/27/2010 03:06

    What the fuck ? I loves me the dark meat.

  18. avatar
    kategoose 03/27/2010 08:48

    watch michelle mcgee’s hottest pics

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  20. avatar
    tenpoundcock 03/27/2010 11:09

    Sandra probably knew all about his White Pride.I heard a clip of her accepting an award in Germany on the Adam Carolla podcast and she speaks German very well. I don’t feel bad for her at all.

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