Kim Kardashians first husband beat her up. A lot.


Some people say kids are our most precious resource, but those people are God damn liars. You can't go 10 feet without seeing some punk ass kid. How precious could they really be? Our real most precious resource is hot sluts with huge breasts. That's why Kim Kardashian is a perfect little angel, and that's why it's extra enraging to hear that her pussy ex-husband would, ahem, "punch her in the face, slam her against walls and throw her across the room.'

KIM KARDASHIAN suffered brutal beatings at the hands of her ex-husband DAMON THOMAS, according to newly-published court documents. Kim eloped to Las Vegas, Nevada, and married music producer Damon in January 2000 when she was just 19. But the marriage was ill-fated, ending three years later after Kim was allegedly held prisoner. America's Star magazine have now obtained the 2003 court documents in which Kim claims Damon would punch her in the face, slam her against walls and throw her across the room.

And the Daily Mail adds this charming gem…

He allegedly showed naked pictures of one of Kim's sisters to her father, branding the siblings 'whores', and constantly wanted to know where Kim was.

I heard one time that Kim has 34DD's. In other words, I believe her story. She's telling the truth, there's no doubt about it. That dude did it.

Vigilante justice gets a bad rap but it shouldn't. Here's an example: I'll give 1000 dollars to every person who sends in a video of themselves punching Damon Thomas in the face. Not the first person. Every person. He's a real tough guy who enjoys fighting so I bet he won't even mind. We should share the gift he gave to Kim. When you never know if a fist might suddenly smash you in the face, life is more exciting!

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