oh stfu esquire

By brendon April 20, 2010 @ 5:34 PM


Esquire magazine has come out with their ‘Women We Love’ issue, with fatty Christina Hendricks on the cover as the ‘Sexiest Woman Alive’, and at one point they have a 75 Greatest Women Of All Time list. For Karen Allen (yes, Karen Allen), they write

Animal House! Raiders of the Lost Ark! Our nine- and twenty-two-year-old selves just fell in love all over again.

‘Raiders’ came out in 1981. So the person writing this is 51 years old. It’s no wonder this magazine is so cool and hip. This list, composed mostly of the writer naming strange women he’d like to fuck, couldn’t be any creeepier unless it was called 75 Women Whose Hair I’d Like to Stroke Before I Eat Them Because They’re All Godless Whores.

(233) Comments

  1. avatar
    Rokan 04/20/2010 18:44


    Go fuck yourself.

  2. avatar
    ohmwrecker 04/20/2010 18:47

    There she is. Never mind.

  3. avatar
    duckbutter 04/20/2010 18:47

    Raiders of the lost ark was a kick ass movie but I have no idea who this chick is. And, I’m still pissed at yoko fuck her!

  4. avatar
    hawt lunch 04/20/2010 18:47

    who the fuck is sappho and why do olden day european women always look like birds

  5. avatar
    GodDestroyer 04/20/2010 18:47

    You’re a queer, but your last sentence made me lol.

  6. avatar
    Barbarella 04/20/2010 18:49

    I didn’t bother reading the post. I just looked at the picture.

    She’s hot…

  7. avatar
    SCUM 04/20/2010 18:53

    Barb, you just dumped the boyfriend right?

  8. avatar
    ohmwrecker 04/20/2010 18:54


  9. avatar
    duckbutter 04/20/2010 18:54

    oh Karen Allen is the one in Raiders

  10. avatar
    Tony 04/20/2010 18:56

    Jessica Fucking Rabbit?

  11. avatar
    Barbarella 04/20/2010 18:57

    Scum… yes.

  12. avatar
    loganwest 04/20/2010 18:59

    This list should be called “75 Greatest Women that Women won’t hate us for Loving.” A 75 greatest women list without Megan Fox means we’re pandering to the women around us. This is a list for that guy that hangs out with the feminists and tries to convince them that he’s all for the cause. This is the worst kind of list of lies.

  13. avatar
    SCUM 04/20/2010 19:00

    SWEEEEET, when are you coming to The City?

  14. avatar
    Observer 04/20/2010 19:00

    Karen Allen has nice tits and a cute little as……

    …..25 years ago…..but still……better than most here….

  15. avatar
    SCUM 04/20/2010 19:01

    loganwest speaks the truth.

  16. avatar
    Observer 04/20/2010 19:01

    I have NO IDEA who else is on the list…….

    ….but dollars to donuts…….I’d shag the lot of ‘em……

  17. avatar
    Barbarella 04/20/2010 19:02

    Haha not sure… I never really head out there anymore.

    I’ve been busy making him my bitch the past few weeks tho…

  18. avatar
    Dean Wormer 04/20/2010 19:03

    Ob’s, there is a lot of DARK people on that list.

  19. avatar
    Dean Wormer 04/20/2010 19:04

    Next time you are in town I will buy you a drink Barb.

  20. avatar
    Observer 04/20/2010 19:05

    Dean Wormer…..

    ….I’d fuck Halle Berry……

    …if she could pick cotton fast enough…..

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