lindsay lohan still has 103 days until she can work again

Even though Lindsay Lohan will only be spending 13 days in jail instead of the 90 she was sentenced to, she still won’t be able to work or be a drunken public menace until November. After that she will be but we have a few months at least. Yahoo News says…

(Within 24 hours of being released) she will begin three months at an inpatient rehab.
That portion of her sentence won’t be trimmed like her jail stint by overcrowding and credits for good behavior.
“It’s a straight 90 days,” prosecutor Danette Meyers said Tuesday.
(Meaning she) will be unavailable until late this year to start filming her portrayal of porn actress Linda Lovelace in a biopic.

Actually that biopic is still complete fantasy because they don’t own the rights to the story. So when the director says things like she’ll be doing “violent full frontal nudity“, he’s just making things up to get his name in the press.

The director is barely even a director, which sort of sucks because (according to a leaked script) who wouldn’t want to see Lindsay being forced to call herself “a fat fatass” while getting fingered or hear her recite lines like…

– “To me, there is nothing more delicious than jism. I love it! I like to smear it all over my face like Ponds Cold Cream!”

– “I was put on this earth for one thing and one thing only… sucking a footlong cock!”

– “Is there anything in this life I like more than cocksucking? Well, one thing. I love it when my man socks it to me in the ass.”

I bet people who know her honestly can’t tell the difference between this and the regular things Lindsay says.