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July 24, 2010 | celebrity | editor | 0 Comments
‘The Other Guys’ is about two NYPD detectives (Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg) who are always in the shadow of two supercops (Dwayne Johnson and Samuel L. Jackson). They’re the backups, basically. So Sony asked who I would want as a backup for the website. Sensing an opportunity to call celebrities juvenile names, here’s the top three:
Lindsay Lohan
PRO: dumb as a rock, would make me look competent.
CON: doesn’t wake up until 3pm, then spends the next hour wondering where she is and why her jaw is sore.
Sean Penn
PRO: thrives on lecturing people.
CON: would write one post then give 8000 interviews to talk about it.
Gwyneth Paltrow
PRO: loves giving advice.
CON: her idea of advice is, “1700 dollar shoes are nice. You should buy some of those.” No, seriously, it is. Because apparently she’s under the impression that we don’t wear 1700 dollar shoes because we didn’t think they’d be nice.
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