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the top 100 stories of 2010 (50-59)
January 1, 2011 | celebrity | editor | 0 Comments
59. HAYLIE DUFF – got huge implants. Was this really one of the biggest stories of the year? Probably not, no, I just really like girls with big tits. (April 1st)
58. INCEPTION – has a striking number of similarities to a Scrooge McDuck comic from 2002, the same year Christopher Nolan began writing the screenplay. Some say Nolan stole the idea, but maybe the writers of Scrooge McDuck stole the idea from Nolans dreams. Oh I know right? Shit just got real, bro. (August 3rd)
57. DARREN ARONOFSKY – is one of the very best directors alive, and he might win an Oscar for Black Swan, and yet his next movie will be the sequel to Wolverine. He could have said he was gonna start taking senior portraits and it wouldn’t have been more surprising. (October 18th)
56. SARAH JESSICA PARKER – was this years Madonna, meaning she’s an old lady who thinks it’s hot if you can see her tendons. And she’s right. Guys love girls who look like trees. (April 21st)
55. LINDSAY LOHAN – got punched in the face by a waitress, and although she didn’t inflict much damage, it’s the thought that counts. (July 2nd)
54. CHRISTINA AGUILERA – divorced her husband Jordan Bratman, a story that would have been higher on the list but she’s not pretty any more and so now she has no value. (October 12th)
53. JULIA ROBERTS – is the most beautiful person in the world, according to People. And you can see why. I would say not just this world, but the whole galaxy, and heaven too. (April 28th)
52. SNOOKI – had naked pictures for sale, but someone told me it wasn’t Snooki at all and since the pictures never materialized, I’m inclined to think that person was right. You can tell it’s not Snooki because she’s on all fours but not scooching her ass across the carpet. (February 12th, February 15th)
51. KENDRA WILKINSON – released a sex tape, but only after lying, poorly, time and time again about where it came from and how it got released. You really need to know your limits in life. If you’re dumb, let someone else think up the plans. (May 5th, May 6th)
50. MILEY CYRUS – wore a bikini a lot. You know that saying, “practice makes perfect”? Not always true as it turns out. (May 24th, May 25th)
