BREAKING NEWS: Jennifer Aniston is dull

In an interview that comes out this weekend in Parade magazine, Brad Pitt confirms what everyone already suspected; that Jennifer Aniston is a soul-crushing bore.

After saying how he loves his life now (with Angelina Jolie and their 6 kids) he adds that wasn’t always the case.

“I spent the ’90s trying to hide out, trying to duck the full celebrity cacophony,” he admits. “I started to get sick of myself sitting on a couch, holding a joint, hiding out. It started feeling pathetic. It became very clear to me that I was intent on trying to find a movie about an interesting life, but I wasn’t living an interesting life myself.”
“I think that my marriage had something to do with it. Trying to pretend the marriage was something that it wasn’t.”

Ahem…

“…I wasn’t living an interesting life … I think that my marriage had something to do with it.”

Oohh, you don’t say. You didn’t want to talk about her haircut anymore? That’s hard to believe. As soon as she said she had to use the restroom on our very first date I would have run out of the restaurant like Indiana Jones diving out of the cave right before that big boulder got him.