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‘War Horse’ has a new trailer

October 5, 2011 | celebrity | editor | 0 Comments

‘War Horse’ has a new full length trailer out today (HD copies here), and I just want to say once again that Steven Speilberg can go fuck himself. I’ll admit that this worked on me but only because I’m a malleable simpleton, not because it’s a good movie. Here’s the plot:

ACT 1: A boy has a horse that he loves very much.
ACT 2: Speilberg spends 2 hours threatening to kill it.
ACT 3: He doesn’t. Or maybe he does. “Ooo, look, I’m taking the audience on an emotional roller coaster.” No, you’re not. You’re just a manipulative dick.

I bet there was only one storyboard to map out this entire movie and it looked like this. That’s supposed to be an Academy Award in Spielbergs hand, by the way, but I can’t draw so it sorta looks like the NBA trophy or a butt plug, which may or may not be a part of Hollywood pitch meetings for all I know. Also you could argue that it wasn’t necessary to include a Star of David on his hat. Things got a little bigoted there at the end.

Tags: movie trailers steven spielberg trailer war horse




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