George Lucas is retiring because he sucks

By brendon January 18, 2012 @ 11:46 AM


George Lucas has had 37 producer credits over the past 20 years, and since pure greed beat up and drowned whatever artistic integrity he may have once had, 35 of them were about either Indiana Jones or Star Wars.

The rare exception is ‘Red Tails’, which opens Friday, and he tells the NY Times that “it will be his final blockbuster.” Which not only seems presumptuous, but is also not true.

“I’m retiring,” Lucas said. “I’m moving away from the business, from the company, from all this kind of stuff.”
Lucas has decided to devote the rest of his life to what cineastes in the 1970s used to call personal films. They’ll be small in scope, esoteric in subject and screened mostly in art houses.

No not really. Actually next he’ll do the exact opposite; produce and write the story for another ‘Indiana Jones’ sequel. But why not let someone else do that, perhaps someone who understands story structure, and who isn’t a complete shithead with horrible ideas. Is it just that Lucas can’t take a hint?

Yes. Yes, that’s exactly what is is.

Lucas seized control of his movies from the studios only to discover that the fanboys could still give him script notes. “Why would I make any more,” Lucas says of the “Star Wars” movies, “when everybody yells at you all the time and says what a terrible person you are?”

At first I thought that was sad, but then I remembered that Lucas had a scene where Jar Jar Binks stepped in shit, and then hopped around saying, “uuba uuba juuba” for two minutes. Now I think it’s sad that those people weren’t throwing broken bottles at him instead of simply yelling.

(9) Comments

  1. avatar
    Mac-Daddy 01/18/2012 12:13

    Lack of tits = Lack of me caring

  2. avatar
    Mac-Daddy 01/18/2012 12:16

    I saw Red Tails already when it was called “The Tuskegee Airmen”

    I have no intention of watching it again!

  3. avatar
    JBizzle 01/18/2012 12:21

    I got bored with hearing the “dubstep” music in the “Red Tails” commercials.

  4. avatar
    Cocktail 01/18/2012 12:22

    You mean “Red Tails” is not about Spring Break in Lauderdale?

  5. avatar
    Gildorg 01/18/2012 12:47

    Yeah, Mac…

    I saw a preview for this pile of poo the other day and I thought they had remade, “Tuskegee Airmen”…

    Seen it once, why see it again… This isn’t Star Wars, after all!

  6. avatar
    harleydavidson 01/18/2012 13:29

    ive hated this motherfucker ever since i waited in line as a14 year old to see the phantom menace only to find out that it made Pootie Tang look like a god damn Best picture winner

  7. avatar
    dubbya 01/18/2012 13:49

    Fucka George Lucas. And Pootie Tang was awesome. He would dropped Darth Maul like a bag’a dirt.

  8. avatar
    QueerWithaGun 01/19/2012 10:21

    The odds that Lucas is actually retiring are right up there with the odds that Brondon likes vagina.

  9. avatar
    jonas123 01/19/2012 13:28

    my friend’s aunt makes $80 every hour on the internet. She has been out of work for 8 months but last month her check was $8721 just working on the internet for a few hours. Here’s the site to read more…

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