George Lucas is giving away $4 billion, is an idiot

By brendon November 01, 2012 @ 3:50 PM


Everyone knows that the last ‘Indiana Jones’ movie and the 3 ‘Star Wars’ prequels were awful, and that was 100 percent George Lucas’ fault because he’s an asshole. He lucked into everything he has and now he thinks he’s much much smarter than he really is. So the only fitting response this week when Disney bought LucasFilm for 4 billion dollars, and then announced plans for more ‘Indiana Jones’ and ‘Star Wars’ movies not made by an idiot, was “fuck” and “yes.”

And what will Lucas do with his 4 billion dollars? Throw it out the window, according to the Hollywood Reporter

Lucas plans to quickly put the bulk of the money into a foundation which will primarily focus on educational issues, a spokesperson for Lucasfilm tells THR. 
“George Lucas has expressed his intention, in the event the deal closes, to donate the majority of the proceeds to his philanthropic endeavors.”
It’s not yet clear which foundation will get the proceeds. Lucas is currently the chairman of Edutopia, which is part of the George Lucas Educational Foundation. He could put money into that or create a new foundation which would be funded from the sale.

I mean that’s great and all, but it’s not like we need all that. I remember I was in a bar right off campus one time and I got in a argument with this snooty yacht club douche, and I showed everyone I was smarter than him and that I had read all the same books he read, and then I told him he dropped a hundred and fifty grand on a fuckin’ education he coulda’ got for a dollar fifty in late charges at the public library. AND THEN, I stole the mildly attractive girl he was after. I’m an amazing man!

(5) Comments

  1. avatar
    vandywisky 11/02/2012 11:14

    There’s no way Lucas is going to “give away” anything even close to 4 billion dollars. Once he dies, his heirs will fight tooth and nail for that money to stay within the family. That being said, the last Indiana Jones movie is one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen.

  2. avatar
    Jeff 11/02/2012 14:21

    Btw, I forgot to thank you for what you did for me in that bar the other day. I got kind of lost when that blonde headed douchebag asked me about the evolution of the market economy in the southern states. I owe you one.

  3. avatar
    heisindc 11/02/2012 20:53

    Smart. Tax laws might change drastically next year depending on the election. Cash out now (even though he doesn’t need cash) and use the money to firm up a legacy in which JarJar does not exist.

  4. avatar
    atari 11/07/2012 03:35

    Princess Leia can still be a princess. Everyone settle down.

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