If You’re Riding Your Pit Bull Cowgirl, You Just Might Be Bipolar

By Bill February 25, 2013 @ 2:31 PM


Contrary to Hollywood depiction, being bipolar isn’t all about looking like Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence and learning how to ballroom dance. Nope, sometimes, bipolar is about being found naked on your lawn having sex with your pit bull. In fact, statistically speaking it’s more often the pit bull banging thing than it is getting lucky with Jennifer Lawrence.

A woman in Las Vegas was arrested after police say they caught her having sex with a pit bull in her backyard… Police said when they arrived, the suspect greeted them, declared that she was bipolar, and continued to touch the dog in a sexual manner.

 - CBS Las Vegas

Well, yeah, you don’t just bang a pit bull and not do a little stroking in the afterglow. A retriever maybe, but not a canine in the terrier class. Those bastards do not forget.

The cops might have felt more sympathetic had they not been vomiting a little bit in their mouths, so Kara Vandereyk of the 300 block of N. 16th Street, Las Vegas (we include her name and address just in case your find yourself picking her up on a match.com date) was booked on a charges of gross lewdness and the dog was handed over to animal control where it went from topping a human female to being mounted by several, tougher dogs in the animal control penitentiary. Tough turn of the worm for Sparky.

wwtdd

(18) Comments

  1. avatar
    Lick-it 02/25/2013 14:41

    Erase all the text…….

    …just write…….”fucked a pitbull…..doggie was slumming”…..

  2. avatar
    deliminator 02/25/2013 14:42

    I actually chuckled at one point in this post, so we’ve got a vast improvement.

    However, it is very difficult not to turn a methhead proudly fucking a dog into at least one laugh.

  3. avatar
    TellYourMomToStopCallingMe 02/25/2013 14:43

    Not bad, Bill. The first paragraph was great. Then you lost it in that second paragraph with that 700 word sentence. Short and sweet, Bill. Short and sweet.

  4. avatar
    gkline 02/25/2013 14:46

    What Would Tyler Durden Do” is a blog focused on bringing you the latest gossip and news about rich and famous celebrities…So has this changed too? Or is that really Kristen Stewart? Or is this a desperate attempt to troll the web for anything remotely funny?

  5. avatar
    SpaceMonkey 02/25/2013 14:54

    Not only is the writing terrible, this story is about a week old. So far this is not going well, but on the upside, there are actual posts today.

  6. avatar
    Rage 02/25/2013 14:58

    This is a story about a woman fucking a pit bull (DOG); not fucking Pitbull (SINGER).

    Pit Bull is not the same as Pitbull….SO THIS ISN’T A FUCKING CELEBRITY STORY YOU…

    You know, I was going to insult you, but I’m sure life has done worse to you than I ever could.

  7. avatar
    sofakingawesome 02/25/2013 15:01

    Bill go fuck yourself. This nonsensical writing has got to stop. Do you even know what the cowgirl position is you dumb fuck?

    Fuck you.
    Fuck you.
    Fuck you.

    This site is worthless now.

    Brendon used to rip on the celebs and would say all the shit that everyone was thinking but now it’s all pathetic dribble aimed at high schoolers. Thanks again for ruining this site by being a total douchebag loser. Please go read a book on grammer or just kill yourself. Actually, forget about the book, just go kill yourself.

  8. avatar
    thejyav 02/25/2013 15:02

    How many high fives have there been at the new WWTDD headquarters after every post today?

  9. avatar
    Lick-it 02/25/2013 15:02

    Also…..I’m pretty sure that dogs LIKE fuckin’……….

    Prison or not…

  10. avatar
    Just the Tip 02/25/2013 15:07

    Is this what the site has been reduced to..?.. Not even Celebrity Snarking, but Beastiality Bashing?

  11. avatar
    Lick-it 02/25/2013 15:30

    Just the Tip……..

    ….at least you stand on principle……

  12. avatar
    Lick-it 02/25/2013 15:32

    Is it too late to mention that “I’d hit it”……

    ….even if it was with a rolled up newspaper…??

  13. avatar
    serenitynow 02/25/2013 16:35

    Hey Bill, I bet your parents dropped you on your head as a baby, and then raped you repeatedly. And then kept doing it on a daily basis, and still do it today. That’s why you’re a terrible writer.

  14. avatar
    tommyoh 02/25/2013 16:36

    This is pathetic. This girl has a mental disorder and is not a celebrity. She didn’t ask for this kind of exposure.

    You guys running this site now are fucking morons. It seems like you never took the time to figure out why most people came here in the first place. It’s not because of tits and ass like you seem to think. The writing was witty and smart while still maintaining a little immaturity – this isn’t easy to pull off.

    My advice is to stop, take a fucking breath and figure out what this site should be. You clearly don’t have a pulse on what made it popular in the first place.

  15. avatar
    Burbank 02/25/2013 20:52

    Is this all part of Project Mayhem?
    Cruel bastards…

  16. avatar
    dotdfan 02/25/2013 21:14

    “The cops might have felt more sympathetic had they not been vomiting a little bit in their mouths, so Kara Vandereyk of the 300 block of N. 16th Street, Las Vegas (we include her name and address just in case your find yourself picking her up on a match.com date) was booked on a charges of gross lewdness and the dog was handed over to animal control where it went from topping a human female to being mounted by several, tougher dogs in the animal control penitentiary.”

    That is a 88 word, 471 character sentence that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with pop culture. “She’s possibly bipolar and…umm…oh, Silver Linings Playbook is about bipolar characters. My job is done here.” You smug fucks. Seriously, shutter this shit.

  17. avatar
    InventedTiME 02/25/2013 23:38

    That was just mean posting the details of Brendon’s going away party in Vegas. Are no things sacred?

  18. avatar
    Tipped 02/27/2013 19:35

    I’m figuratively slamming my head against the wall. Bill you can’t write, this isn’t for you, you don’t know anything about sentence structure, and you don’t understand what commas are for,

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