James Franco is a natural at deep throat

By brendon February 13, 2013 @ 3:29 PM

james-franco-details

I’m not homophobic at all, in any way, except in the sense that seeing two guys in a sexual situation might make me throw up. I know that’s probably bad but I can’t help it. I support gay rights in every way, I despise pussies who bully gay kids, but male gay sex really freaks me out. It’s not as awful as ‘Girls’ on HBO, but it’s close.

Point being, if I stumbled upon the fact that I had a natural talent for deep throating things, here’s how I’d handle it:

1. Tell no one; take it to my grave.

Here’s how James Franco handled the same thing:

1. Tell literally the entire world. Or at least the 10 people who even know Details magazine still exists.

In the first of several three-ways, Franco performs some very impressive deep throat on two of his character’s pistols after the girls turn the tables on him and shove them in his mouth.
“Most people can’t get past that gag reflex at the back of the throat,” I say.
“Guess I’m a natural,” he says with a laugh. “It was my first time.”
“So that wasn’t you in Broken Tower (deep-throating a dildo)?”
“Oh shit, you’re right!” Franco’s eyes light up. “It wasn’t my first time.”
“You’re known for going the extra mile, but that was, what, a good eight inches?”
He gives me a get-real look. “That was a dildo.” Then he turns that look back on himself, and I see the real James Franco: “If I’d had the guts, it woulda been real.”

I on the other hand am so insecure that if a doctor tried to save my life by putting an intubator down my throat I’d push his hand away and my last words on earth would be, “knock it off… fag.”

wwtdd

(7) Comments

  1. avatar
    Pottz 02/13/2013 15:35

    This post alone makes you gay. No tits post = You’re Gay.

    I bet dicks make you as happy as Eddie Money running a travel agency.

  2. avatar
    MacDaddy 02/13/2013 15:42

    OK I did laugh at that last line.

    Pottz: That was a riot!

  3. avatar
    SpaceMonkey 02/13/2013 16:01

    The changes to the site have been amazing so far. Just look at too day for example. It’s 3:00PM and there are two posts for today, one about a 50 year old woman w/ hard nipples that ceased to be relevant about two decades ago and one about how James Franco can deep throat very well. You are killing it bro.

  4. avatar
    Cryder555 02/13/2013 16:15

    Way to rip off Pajiba…

  5. avatar
    Hugh G. Rection 02/13/2013 16:44

    I remember really liking Details magazine in 1994.

  6. avatar
    TheBlackReturns 02/13/2013 17:05

    Mac I agree, it was funny

  7. avatar
    Pottz 02/13/2013 19:22

    I should write for this website instead of this penis lover.

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