Dead Writers On Planes, No Problem

The likely shitty musical based on Breakfast at Tiffany’s had to go up on Broadway without its guest of honor: the moldering ashes of Truman Capote. You might recall from having been forced to read the book from some failed poet ex-English major teacher/girlfriend, that the book was written by fancy lad Truman Capote. It’s about a social climbing gold digger that will do anything to be rich and famous…so, Kris Jenner, but without the obvious cock. Broadway finally granted the wish of generations of gay dudes and obese women and brought the story to the the stage. The producers of the show thought it would be awesome if the small fruity man that wrote the book could be there opening night. Only he’s been dead for decades. Luckily, Johnny Carson’s ex-wife has some of his ashes. She was going to bring powdered Truman but she decided not to because she was afraid someone would steal the ashes. Mind you, she COULD have brought Truman’s ashes on the plane. It’s legal, I looked it up. So, I can’t bring a normal sized bottle of shampoo on my carry-on but it’s perfectly legal to bring the soot that once was a human being on board? What the fuckity fuck, TSA?

The show stars Game of Thrones Daenerys Targaryen, (Emilia Clarke), but she doesn’t show her almost perfectly round breasts nor is her snatch strategically covered by CGI dragons. So what’s the point?