Kim Kardashian Gets Bloody Money Shot

If this were a fill in the blanket contest and you heard, ‘Kim Kardashian just got sprayed in the face with _________’, the word ‘blood’ probably wouldn’t come to mind. It came up number seven on my own list, well after jizz, Khloe shat, kumquat juice, AstroGlide, small foreign coins, and Kanye punches. Still, it happened. Because in a desperate attempt to cover up the fact that the Kim Death Star is now nearly the size of a celestial object, Kim shot her face up with fatty blood from her arm. It’s some new 90210 procedure meant to get rid of wrinkles in your face.

You know what else gets rid of wrinkles in your face? Not being a money-sucking merchandise whore bearing the bastard baby of a demented fashion-rapper. Hindsight is 20-20. So onto the bloody injections.