Sofia Vergara Was Always Sexy (VIDEO)

By Bill March 14, 2013 @ 2:03 PM

I always read these stories about how older married couples rediscover long since forgotten romantic photos of themselves and it reminds them of their young love. Just kidding. I don’t read. I saw that in a Cialis ad during a hockey game. But this seems like the kind of shit old married couples do when they’re not trying to poison each other for insurance payoffs.

And I can relate. Sometimes, I forget how much I want to bone Sofia Vergara until my dick falls off and God tells me I’m done. But then I see some sexy shit like Sofia’s 1998 calendar photoshoot and I remember how amazing the sex was on the honeymoon we never had. I just look at the restraining order from her attorneys and smile wistfully at the sunset like that dude in the Cialis ad who knows he’s about to do his 60-something wife something fierce.

(Yeah, I added the music. You hate it. Everybody hates everybody else’s music. Deal with it.)

(8) Comments

  1. avatar
    Digital Wonderbread 03/14/2013 14:44

    She had a son when she was fairly young, so of course she’d still be way hot after he and his friends finished puberty.

    Could you imagine what it would be like if everyone you knew wanted to fuck your mom?

  2. avatar
    Maybe_Observer 03/14/2013 18:11

    I can’t but I’d check with Peepers and Roken……

    ….wait …..did you say “wanted to”….or “already had”..?

  3. avatar
    Blicero 03/14/2013 20:00

    This is such a blatant ripoff of a Brandon post (Pretend You Had Sex With Above Girl joke + restraining order joke) but i guess it’s better than Bill coming up with his own terrible jokes? No, it’s just as bad.

  4. avatar
    Admiral 03/14/2013 20:26

    Father Time is a fucking asshole! He destroys women mercilessly.

  5. avatar
    ThisSiteIsGayPornography 03/14/2013 23:10

    I’d hit it so hard from behind, she would have black eyes from those magnificent baby feeders.

  6. avatar
    Koglaw 03/14/2013 23:22

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  7. avatar
    wayne44870 03/15/2013 12:35

    Love everything about Sofia

  8. avatar
    HungryC 03/15/2013 21:44

    How does one go about getting a job as the guy who gets to rub oil and sand on such a fine ass for the bikini photoshoot? The man must hate his job.

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