“Let Them Titties Fly!” – Says Science

A study in France finds that bras not only don’t keep boobs perky later in life, they may contribute to premature sagging. We all know that as a woman gets older gravity does its cruel justice and begins turning once firm and nubile titties into pendulous flesh sacks. It’s been common wisdom that bras help slow down this process by supporting the weight. The French science guys who did the study said that they saw no positive impact of wearing a bra either to alleviate back pain or to prevent sagging. Anybody who’s ever been to France knows the local women love to let their udders hang free already. Sound sexy? Yeah, in porn with 18-25 year old girls it’s great. In the streets of any city in this world with 60-year old ladies dangling headlights bouncing around their boot tops, you could end up scarred out of your senses like Tommy.

The vast majority of female tubage simply looks better in a bra (until it’s time to get your bone-on, of course). Plus, aren’t the French the same people who gave us sexy lingerie? Men like it when the women folk don sexy underwear to get our motor running. Don’t take that away from us, you fucking Frogs.