Live By the Ponytail, Die By the Ponytail (VIDEO)

Here’s everything I know about India. Even the people who live there can’t understand the movies so they turn to obscure forms of outdoor exhibitionism when it’s time to let loose on the weekends. Like dudes dancing with cobras, eating super spicy food that will give you the shits, and, of course, navigating a zip line over a river with your ponytail attached to the wire. Sailendra Nath Roy should’ve considered the spicy food thing instead of the ponytail thing because then he might be alive today.

This video is not nearly as gruesome as I first suspected. He didn’t really die from his ponytail ripping off his scalp and plummeting to his death. He had a heart attack. And the cell phone camera guy stopped filming before Roy went limp. Stil, when you consider that a vast majority of men who have ponytails end up being shivved in prison after child sexual assault convictions, cardiac arrest over a river isn’t so bad.