John Malkovich, Hero?

June 10, 2013 | celebrity | editor | 0 Comments

John Malkovich suspended being creepy as fuck for a few minutes to save a guy. An old fart named Jim Walpole tripped and sliced his neck open on some scaffolding while on vacation in Toronto. Lucky for him Cyrus the Virus was lurking nearby, (because that’s what he does). He wrapped the guys neck with a towel to lessen the bleeding until the ambulance arrived. That must have been difficult for Malkovich as I imagine the sight of blood gives him an erection. The old guy lived and John Malkovich went back to scaring children and slowly consuming chocolate dildos or whatever he does in his spare time.

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