Queen Elizabeth Gets A Raise

By Michael June 28, 2013 @ 2:29 PM

Queen Elizabeth, the richest old working broad on Earth, is getting a pay raise. Her “salary” was £36.1 million a year but is now going to be £37.9 million, (that’s like $57 million in real money). The Queen basically gets a shitload of tax money every year for queening, which as far as I can tell involves her not dying. The government figured that since she had managed to not croak for 50 years and did that one video with Daniel Craig for the 2012 Olympics she deserved more money from people who actually work for a living. She says she’ll use most of the money for much needed repairs to her many castles. Basically it’s a home improvement loan that she never has to pay back because she is the queen.

It’s times like this that make me glad I’m an American. Liz’s only qualification for that money is being the product of centuries of cousins fucking. If that is all it takes then everyone in Mississippi is a fucking emperor. In this country, you can’t just say here’s my last name, now pay me my money, bitches. You have to have some talent and do a little work. Or at least film yourself having sex and be on a reality TV show. If I was British, I’d tell Liz to pay to fix her own fucking palaces. Only I’d say it really politely and far more subtly, like the Brits do. She is the queen after all.

(3) Comments

  1. avatar
    Lektor 06/28/2013 15:28

    You are an idiot and an emabarassment to all of the USA. Before you go out there flapping your mouth try actually researching how the monarchy works. Here is a video guide for idiots like you who need things explained to them like a child http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhyYgnhhKFw

    In case watching the video is too hard for you let me sum it up. The salary that Britain pays the Queen is in exhcange from the profit of the Royal Lands. The annual revenue that comes from these lands is 200million an year. So in case it’s still hard for you to understand by paying the Queen a mere 40miilion an year Britain is making close to 160million every year.

    Now let’s see if you have the balls to apoligise or if you are going to further emarbass the USA

  2. avatar
    Beylerbey 06/28/2013 16:48

    And those “royal” lands were seized by “royal” fiat long before the UK was the UK. All your lands are belong to the crown, proles.

    These are nothing but parasites in funny costumes.

  3. avatar
    joesday 07/16/2013 19:32

    Try again, Lektor…

    Why “The True Cost of the Royal Family Explained” is wrong…

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