Jennifer Aniston Likes Having a Fiance

By Lex July 29, 2013 @ 1:03 PM

Jennifer Aniston Walking Into A Building In SoHo
Jennifer Aniston likes being engaged, going on for a year now with no real marriage pending.

“We just want to do it when it’s perfect, and we’re not rushed, and no one is rushing from a job or rushing to a job. And, you know, we already feel married.”

Wow, Justin Theroux. Get the fuck out. Now. Sure, you can call this liberating for the dude as he gets to plow Jennifer Aniston without having to marry her. But that’s regular guy’s logic. Jennifer Aniston is no gold digger. She’s got all the gold. She’s just keeping you wrapped up in an engagement prison of her long and complex baggage. Those berating screams assaulting your left ear when you look at another woman. Yeah, those aren’t going away, pal. Your fiancee loves being engaged like she likes holding your nuts in her designer clutch. GTFO now.

Photo Credit:, Splash

(2) Comments

  1. avatar
    Admiral 07/29/2013 13:54

    Whatever – the battle against Aniston is pretty much over. Aniston still has her tits, which means she wins. The end.

  2. avatar
    Beylerbey 07/29/2013 16:08

    I’m glad Admiral had the balls to say it. Because Lex had his balls removed.

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