Kris Jenner, the crusty vaginal font of all things Kardashian, said that she doesn’t think her new granddaughter will be picked on at school for her name. Kris was on Watch What Happens Live on Wednesday and gay Muppet host Andy Cohen asked her if she thought that lil’ North was going to be mocked by kids in school because, you know, her name is fucking stupid, her mom is a porn star, and her dad, by this point, has moved on to lower maintenance women. Kris said that she didn’t think kids would make fun of North because,
“You don’t walk around saying, ‘Hi, North West.’ You walk around saying, ‘Hi North’ or whatever her nickname may end up being.”
Um, no. Since Kris Jenner hasn’t been in school in many years and denied her own girls that same experience, she just doesn’t understand how school playgrounds work. First of all kids are fucking assholes and they’ll make fun of your name even if it’s something normal like Bob or Stephanie, (Bob Slob or Stepher Heifer, for example). What do you think growing up with the name Jack was like? Being called things like Jackass, Jackoff, Jack-O-Lantern, etc were almost daily occurrences. Even if you don’t say the full name of North West, just North is pretty fucking stupid. It’s a direction not a name and it especially sounds weird on a girl. It’s not going to take many clever school bully minutes before this girl is being called North Stew, Wicked Bitch of the North, Great Half-White North, and other names I’m going to whisper to the little kids in her school to help them torment the Kardashian-West baby. Whatever doesn’t kill her will only make her richer.