Here’s the Chick Who Wouldn’t Sell Oprah A Fucking Purse

By Lex August 12, 2013 @ 5:39 PM

The Swiss Paula Deen, the woman who wouldn’t show Oprah Winfrey the expensive purses in her Zurich store, has finally been exposed. Meh, I couldn’t be bothered to look up her actual name, but suffice it to say, she’s a cross between Bull Connor and the plantation owner played by Leonardo DiCaprio in Django Unchained. Our long international nightmare is over. In typical Swiss fashion, everybody in the entire country of Switzerland apologized to Oprah, everyone duly admitting that had they known she was an important black person and not a broke-ass stealing ghetto crack smoking black person, they would’ve let her shop for the high end purses. Apologies accepted, everyone in Switzerland went back to work making clocks and hiding stolen gold from Jewish Holocaust victims.

wwtdd

(6) Comments

  1. metschan 08/12/2013 18:58

    Brandon has to be Lex right? Clearly the best writer on here and the same style all the way. If not, whatever. 100% of the time when I love the post I look up to see Lex’s name at the top.

  2. RoreyRock 08/12/2013 19:56

    What a load of race baiting crap!? When you view the world thru race tinted lenses- everything that happens you you is racist. The sales assistant said this; “It is absolutely not true that I declined to show her the bag on racist grounds. I even asked her if she wanted to look at the bag,” the sales assistant added.
    Lets destroy another career of an innocent person – BTW- OW is the most overrated fat- ugly piece of shyte I have ever had the displeasure of viewing. W/o face paint she looks like a fat ass bag lady~~

  3. The Mildly Tanned Knight 08/12/2013 20:02

    Well based on her lies about Trayvon Martin, I think it’s likely that the clerk is the one telling the truth here. Oprah is just lying to get her name back in the headlines since her empire is beginning to decline.

  4. Cybergy 08/12/2013 20:58

    Her neck looks leathery. But not expensive. More like back-seat NYC cab sort of leather.

  5. Al Bundy 08/13/2013 00:53

    >everyone in Switzerland went back to work making clocks and hiding stolen gold from Jewish Holocaust victims.<

    Ok, that was funny.

    @metschan – Lex is not funny. He says something humorous at best about once every 10 posts.

  6. Hugh G. Rection 08/13/2013 11:37

    Lex is OK but Jack is moving up fast in the WWTDD power rankings.

    When TF is Br3ndon going to launch his new site?

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