Liberty Ross Takes Off Her Top and Spills Her Guts

November 13, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen | 0 Comments

Nothing says I want to get this whole cheating and divorce scandal behind me like doing a tell all piece for Vanity Fair a year and a half after the story broke, and a year after nobody cares anymore. I don’t think there’s actually a way to spin the tale of losing your director husband to young Kristen Stewart demanding you service her angry snatch during set breaks. But Liberty Ross is trying in Vanity Fair, and she’s also taking off her top just to let you know she’s serious about being the aggrieved party.

‘I just visualised being this sort of Maasai warrior. I was just going to stand very still and very strong, and just let it roll past me.’

The Maasai warrior visualization technique is a pretty standard emotional survival response for models when bulimia and wearing oversized flannel shirts simply won’t do the trick. The Maasai tribes of sub-Saharan Africa are long heralded for handling cunnilingus cheating scandals.

I’ve done everything I could to be the perfect wife and mother and really support my husband. But I didn’t have any more to give, you know?’

Yes, yes, we do know. You were perfect. We don’t even need to cross examine this statement in the least if you give us a seductive photo shoot for the article. In fact, you show us some tit and we won’t even ask about what happened between you and ‘super close friend’ 60-year old Jimmy Iovine after you found out about your husband’s affair. Anybody who says print journalism is dead simply isn’t looking at Liberty Ross’ tits hard enough in this story.

Photo Credit: Vanity Fair

Tags: liberty ross vanity fair

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