Nigella Lawson Loves Her Some Coke

Nigella Lawson is the famous British TV cook and all around society woman whose rich ad executive husband tried to choke her out with his Kung Fu grip over lunch earlier this year. Apparently, that’s frowned upon in Britain. Now Nigella has problems of her own because her and her former husband’s two assistant sisters who purloined a million bucks from the couple  are blaming Nigella’s daily cocaine use as the reason it was all so simple. I’m not sure that’s an actual legal defense, but they brought it up nonetheless. And it was confirmed in an email by her former husband, Charles Saatchi, that was read aloud in court:

“Nigella, I was sent these by a newspaper and I can only laugh at your sorry depravity. Of course now the Grillos will get off on the basis that you … were so off your head on drugs that you allowed the sisters to spend whatever they liked and yes I believe every word the Grillos have said, who after all only stole money. But I’m sure it was all great fun and now everything is perfect – bravo, you have become a celebrity hostess on a global TV game show. And you got the pass you desired, free to heartily enjoy all the drugs you want, forever. Classy.”

That’s basically how polite British people write ‘fuck you, cunt’ to their ex-wives. At this point, I’m rooting for Thelma and Louise, because they’re hot in a relatively English witches coven kind of way.

Photo Credit: WENN