Justin Bieber Is Retiring From Music (VIDEO)

By Travis December 18, 2013 @ 10:00 AM

Hooker-loving bucket-pisser Justin Bieber was a guest on Power 106 in Los Angeles yesterday to promote his upcoming album, or maybe we should call it his final album to be more accurate. Bieber, possibly high as fuck, told the dozen or so people in the studio that after Journals is released, he’s “retiring, man” and he’s done with music, because what better way to get people to stop talking about how much of a shithead you are than by threatening to stop doing what you’re famous for? Then, when he’s eventually busted for a DUI or when a dead prostitute is found in his driveway, he can declare, “My new album drops next month!” before tossing the Chris Brown Guide to Public Relations in his trash.

(4) Comments

  1. avatar
    miche the killer 12/18/2013 10:59

    This is like people who threaten suicide just to hear other people harp on them. Just do it already. We don’t like you anyhow.

  2. avatar
    Dr. Johnny Fever 12/18/2013 12:34

    We could only hope that this douche actually retires and goes away forever. He’s gonna “retire” like Jay Z, Eminem, and freakin’ Hulk Hogan retired.

  3. avatar
    TitsAreNice 12/18/2013 15:29

    I wish he’d retire from life.

  4. avatar
    DrainBammage 12/18/2013 17:25

    That’s what Timberlake said and now we have the boydander in movies, TV and music.
    I fear the litle weasel will grow up to be a known older weasel,
    Tthe generation before Tuimberlake had to deal with seeing da Walhberg musical geniuses stay in the public conscience forever.
    Get ready to watch a cop show with Le Biever in 15yrs where he plays a streetwise cop.
    These viruses dont go away, even Vanilla Ice and Billy Ray are respectable once again. Like herpes, they recede a bit ready to take advantage of any weaknesses to pounce again. .
    The only thing that will stop that from haunting us for the next few decades is hopefully an overdose or erotic self-asphyxiation. Or both.

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