Sharon Osbourne Shores Up Her Cooter

December 3, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen | 0 Comments

Proving that no Sharon Osbourne vagina story is a good Sharon Osbourne vagina story, the cackling talk show maven managed to burp out on British TV that he’s had some work done tightening up her lady cave. ┬áCivil engineers used pretty much the same process employed to shore up the New Orleans levees to make Sharon’s snatch feel less like a bowl of decomposing pudding and more like the vice gripping kegel beast that kept Ozzy coming back even when he could barely remember his own name. Sharon called the process excruciating. The physician who had to laser back her undulating meat curtains agreed.

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